This forum is in permanent archive mode. Our new active community can be found here.

Dating

134689274

Comments

  • I could not agree with lukeburrage more on his advice.
    In any relationship, romantic or otherwise, I attempt always to see the person as themselves (a complete entity unto themselves as individuals) rather than seeing them as their role in my life. It has become clear to me as I have grown up that this is a relative oddity, and that a lot of people define others (and even themselves) solely on their "roles". Too often, seeing others for what they are to you/what they provide to you not only disconnects you from them, but also generates a world view that the world is defined by its relation to you, and by your relation to it. I know this seems obvious - but it is a genuine issue that I have observed in several relationships.
    I also think that actions speek louder than words (though the words are still nice) when it comes to expressing affection. Consistant thoughtfulnees in everyday actions says far more than a box of roses or a cliche statement ever could. That being said, a thoughtful humorous or sweet card, note minor token or gesture, etc. when one person is having a bad day or for no reason at all is always nice.
  • I also think that actions speek louder than words (though the words are still nice) when it comes to expressing affection. Consistant thoughtfulnees in everyday actions says far more than a box of roses or a cliche statement ever could. That being said, a thoughtful humorous or sweet card, note minor token or gesture, etc. when one person is having a bad day or for no reason at all is always nice.
    I've noticed that several times in my parents marriage (27 yrs and going).

    As for myself, I've never been in a relationship, and as such cannot speak on such matters.
  • I need a date idea. I've never been fond of the ol' "dinner and a movie".
  • Go to the zoo. Look at monkeys. Capuchins, especially.
  • I need a date idea. I've never been fond of the ol' "dinner and a movie".
    Paintballing and shiatsu massage.
  • edited December 2008
    Here are some ideas I'm kicking around.

    -There's a nice little aquarium at the end of the pier in my town. We could spend some time there and then walk around downtown/the strand/the beach.

    -Go see Bolt. She loves Disney movies, especially animated ones, and I heard that it's actually pretty good. The only thing about that is if we're watching a movie we're not talking, which is the main reason I don't like "dinner and a movie".

    -Go fly kites, because it's awesome.

    -Go bike riding, because it's awesome. Could also be combined with aquarium or kites.

    Any more ideas or suggestions on which of these are the best are appreciated.
    Post edited by Sail on
  • I approve of kites and biking. Also aquarium. Maybe fly kites after biking to the pier and visiting the aquarium if you have time.
  • Any more ideas or suggestions on which of these are the best are appreciated.
    Why don't you take her sailing?

    Plays are a little better than movies as far as conversations go. Plays often give you more to talk about afterwards. Comedy clubs are good that way too. Some of the best comedy club dates come from open mike night. It's cheap and sometimes unintentionally funny. If you live near a university, museum, or good library, you might take her to a guest lecture on some topic you both find interesting.
  • Why don't you take her sailing?
    Why has this never occurred to me before?
  • Why has this never occurred to me before?
    Sometimes the most obvious things are right under our noses that we need others to point out that we do not realize. ^_~ Good luck on your date!
  • Why don't you take her sailing?
    Why has this never occurred to me before?
    Don't forget to watch Dead Calm with her beforehand!
  • I'd be careful with everything that makes you sweat, for obvious reasons. Of course going swimming or taking a shower afterwards could end up making the date more interesting.
  • How about bowling?
  • I don't know about that, bowling is a lot of fun when your with a bunch of friends, but with just two people it's just not as fun.
  • Go shopping with her.
  • Go shopping with her.
    If you are talking about clothes shopping I can not think of a more fine TORTURE.
  • Depends on were you go. Just recently me and my girlfriend took a bus to Providence Mall and we had a blast there. Hell even when we were at Talbots we had a great time.
  • Go shopping with her.
    If you are talking about clothes shopping I can not think of a more fine TORTURE.
    There are not many things that are less interesting for a guy than a woman's clothing store, but if you can deal with it, she will probably be impressed. Also, she might model some clothes for you.
  • Go shopping with her.
    If you are talking about clothes shopping I can not think of a more fine TORTURE.
    There are not many things that are less interesting for a guy than a woman's clothing store, but if you can deal with it, she will probably be impressed. Also, she might model some clothes for you.
    If you show her that you care more about her interests than yours, she will like you more, and probably reciprocate. Duh.
  • She... backed out.
  • edited December 2008
    Damn, that sucks
    Post edited by Jordan O. on
  • Depends on were you go. Just recently me and my girlfriend took a bus to Providence Mall and we had a blast there. Hell even when we were at Talbots we had a great time.
    Wait...are you talking about the Providence Place Mall?
  • If you show her that you care more about her interests than yours, she will like you more, and probably reciprocate. Duh.
    If you don't care more about her interests than your own, don't show her that you do! It is called lying.
  • If you are talking about clothes shopping I can not think of a more fine TORTURE.
    What about sexy clothes shopping? Is that TORTURE? :P
    She... backed out.
    Lame. Sorry to hear that, but there will be more opportunities for you in the future. At least now you know of a good date activity instead of dinner and movie.

    (Side note: Every time I think or hear of dinner and a movie, I think of the TBS show, "Dinner and A Movie", and the theme song "Beans and Cornbread" starts playing in my head. -_-)
  • What about sexy clothes shopping? Is that TORTURE? :P
    Sexy clothes are best tried out in the bedroom :-p
  • She... backed out.
    Ouch.

    Definitely keep the "take her sailing" idea for future use, though. That's a fantastic freakin' idea. If there's storage space on your sailboat, you could pack a lunch, sail to a small island, and have a picnic.
  • She... backed out.
    Ouch.

    Definitely keep the "take her sailing" idea for future use, though. That's a fantastic freakin' idea. If there's storage space on your sailboat, you could pack a lunch, sail to a small island, and have a picnic.
    MAKE SURE SHE DOES NOT GET SEA SICK FIRST.... This is vital.
  • If this boat is a rockin'... it is just a strong wind... *la sigh*
  • If you show her that you care more about her interests than yours, she will like you more, and probably reciprocate. Duh.
    If you don't care more about her interests than your own, don't show her that you do! It is called lying.
    The trick is to fake sincerity. Once you've got that down, everything else is easy.

    Seriously though, you don't have to like her interests more than yours -- you just have to care about them more. That means listening to her and participating in the things she likes as a way of showing your interest and respect for her. You don't have to like shoe shopping, but if you listen to her talk about shoes and then help her pick out a couple of pairs based on what she told you, it will show you are genuinely interested in her.

    And Sail, you must explain what happened here, man. We can't just have chicks mistreating you all willy-nilly. If need be, we can call Geek Militia Post 1337 out to track her down and teach her a lesson.
  • Seriously though, you don't have to like her interests more than yours -- you just have to care about them more.
    I disagree entirely. Caring about your partners interests is good, and needed, but not more than your own interests. If you feel you have to do that you are on a rocky start in your relationship.

    Find someone who has interesting interests, and who finds yours interesting, and you'll have a good balance. Sacrifice none of your passions for your partner, and expect them to sacrifice nothing in return. Be honest, be equal.
Sign In or Register to comment.