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If modern videogames encourage violence..

edited April 2010 in Video Games
Assuming modern videogames encourage violence, how would the games you played in your youth affect you?

For instance, I should be prone to running at high speed, jumping on robots and collecting up any metallic rings I come across. In addition, faced with an impassable obstacle, I should search the building for an adversary of considerable strength to defeat before searching adjacent rooms for an item that should help me. Sound financial stability can be obtained through horticulture, and various coloured drinks can be used in place of medical attention.
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Comments

  • Aaaaaaaaaargh, there's a Marcus Brigstocke joke that's perfect for this, but I can't find a video.
  • Every so often I get this urge to buy a whip and go to Romania to kick some vampire ass. You should totally bust open random walls - there's often delicious meat inside, despite the lack of adequate refrigeration.
  • I always carry a hand-held light source with me, so as not to fall into a pit and break every bone in my body. I'm not sure whether or not to consider myself fortunate that I've never encountered a dwarf with an axe; I hear he's got bad aim.
  • ... and collecting up any metallic rings I come across .
    Are you saying you wouldn't pick up any large metallic rings that you come across? I would assume they would have some sort of monetary value, or at least look cool hanging on your wall.
  • I should be intensely interested in martial arts, have a very romantic view of scientists, and take great enjoyment from manoeuvring through a series of obstacles at high speed.

    Oh, wait...
  • Are you saying you wouldn't pick up any large metallic rings that you come across?
    I was thinking more of the kind of thing you'd find at scrap yards.
  • No matter what situation... crowbar the fucker.
  • If only I could say that I had played Parappa the Rapper as a kid.
  • I hoard all the dollar coin I can in hopes of getting 100x.
  • I got a paper route once. I still need therapy from all the shit I saw.
  • edited April 2010
    If you punch punk kids in the street, they vomit out coins for you! Since discovering this, I cannot help but assault every punk kid I see, and furthermore I am utterly convinced that it is my duty to rescue everyone's girlfriend.
    Post edited by Johannes Uglyfred II on
  • If you punch punk kids in the street, they vomit out coins for you! Since discovering this, I cannot help but assault every punk kid I see, and furthermore I am utterly convinced that it is my duty to rescue everyone's girlfriend.
    Also apparently you can run around punching punk kids and never be hassled by the police!
  • I sometimes break into peoples' houses and break all of the vases, then I go outside and come back in, and they have brand new fucking vases!!!! So I bust those too.
  • I wander around in a castle and throw rocks at bats.
  • I should be intensely interested in martial arts, have a very romantic view of scientists, and take great enjoyment from manoeuvring through a series of obstacles at high speed.

    Oh, wait...
  • If I meet a person who has skills I don't I plan to kill him in order to get his skills. I also plan how could I use someones else's skills to help me kill my next target.
  • I had a tendency to enjoy games where the player was uber-powerful and everyone else was a weak and pitiful grunt (think Rampage or Dynasty Warriors). I should definitely be a lot more egotistical right now, and I would probably be picking a lot more fights. Once I get into trouble, I'd just run away, eat a dumpling and charge back into the fray.
  • I constantly find myself marching to the side, dropping lower, reversing direction, and increasing speed.
  • I'd wait for everyone around me to go before I said or did anything, then wait again before I could take another action.
  • I could hold weapons thrice as large as my body, would be unable to see anyone I meet around me until I they randomly appeared, and my hair would defy gravity.
  • I would go from place place buying the newest stuff because it is 2% better. This runs me so low on money that I can't even stay at the inn. Thankfully I can always make some more money by performing a random and repetitive task....damn it!

    Well if video games taught me anything, by the time I hit the 3/4 point in the game I'll have so much money that losing half of it is no big deal.
  • edited April 2010
    I find that I can move faster by jumping continuously and turning from side to side than I can by just running.
    Post edited by lackofcheese on
  • I've shot thousands upon thousands of ducks. Never seem to be able to shoot dogs, though.
  • edited April 2010
    I tell girls I can make them stars if they let me smack them with my sticky balls. My dad only speaks in the royal We.
    Post edited by WindUpBird on
  • edited April 2010
    I tornado roundhouse every crate I come across in hope of obtaining peach-like fruits. I am known as the "Discount Barber" among my Nazi foes for my stunning accuracy with and M1 Garand, and I keep dog biscuits in my pocket. Ignoring the debilitating injuries I sustain in each attempt, I often jump on a skateboard and try to grind a 70-foot rail, ollie off, and do kickflip to crossbone stalefish at the end. I never allow apes to escape.
    Post edited by Walker on
  • I would be doing crazy acrobatics, leaping from pole to ledge, running up and across walls then jumping off them. I would climb up towers, avoiding dangerous traps without a care in the world because I believe I can control time. I would always be waving a little dagger around sticking it in people because I want sand.
  • Insult-swordfighting!
  • So I got my P.H.D. in theoretical physics and went to work for a big company in Arizona and on my first day there we tear a hole in the fabric of reality which summons aliens and monsters from who knows where. If that wasn't enough the military decides that everything in the complex needs to die, so in order to survive I've had to kill everything I see. Then after I get everything back to normal (single handedly I might add, everyone else is freaking useless) I get shanghaied by some shady dude into some sort of inter-dimensional mercenary group that decides that I need to be on earth 40 years in the future when it has been taken over by space communists, and now shit's fucked up so I have to shoot/bludgeon my way to victory. Then I kill whatever the fuck his name was and then the enormous metal cock the space communists built in the town square blows up and the shady dude is back and now I'm stuck back in the middle of this pocket dimension again.
    I should have been a pilot.
  • I moved into a huge house, and there was crap left all over the place. My wife kept pointing at me, and wouldn't let me pass. In the end I had to perform a Quirkafleeg.
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