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Dream Lover

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  • edited November 2011


    Though whenever I see the thread title, I think of this:
    Post edited by Omnutia on
  • After playing it at gigs so many times, that song only exists in this form to me:
  • I just remembered something important. A nymphomaniac as a girlfriend is NOT a good thing. It might sound like fun, but if she truly is a sex addict, she'll not only be having sex with you, but also, when you're not available, sex with other guys.

    Take it from me, that will not lead to a strong relationship.

    Also the word nymphomaniac has the word mania in it. Mania means crazy. Remember guys, don't put the penis in the crazy!
  • I just remembered something important. A nymphomaniac as a girlfriend is NOT a good thing. It might sound like fun, but if she truly is a sex addict, she'll not only be having sex with you, but also, when you're not available, sex with other guys.

    Take it from me, that will not lead to a strong relationship.

    Also the word nymphomaniac has the word mania in it. Mania means crazy. Remember guys, don't put the penis in the crazy!
  • I take a simpler approach.

    I like steak. Do you know what's better than steak? Two steaks.
    Another reason that I like the girl/girl porn better than the guy/girl porn: Most of those guys look like exactly the same sort of jock bastards who beat me up on a daily basis in high school, and then became fraternity boys who similarly made life hard in college and law school.

    Seeing one of those guys in a porn scene really ruins the atmosphere. I start thinking about how much I dislike the guy, and it becomes hard to focus.

    I think there should be a new branch of porn aimed exclusively at geeks and nerds. No overly muscled jock types. No impossibly beautiful blondes who have obviously had Michael Jackson levels of plastic surgery. Backdrops would include computer labs, chemistry labs, spaceships, libraries, comic book shops, etc. What do you think?

  • Things I'm looking for in a guy:
    • Be an awesome bang maid.
    • Has to like cats. Especially black ones.
    • Has to look cute. The body doesn't have to be trim.
    • Has to be funny. Be able to hold serious arguments with hand puppets.
    • Be able to discuss anything no matter how small.
    • Must like going to geeky events like anime conventions and ren faires.
    • Must be geeky.
    • Must like eating healthy things.
  • One thing that Joe and I likely have in common is that none of the geeky girls on here would want to date old guys like us! Which is kind if sad because geeky girls that are our age are very rare...
  • I like my women like I like my video games. Beaten.
  • I like my women like I like my coffee: Piping hot and just a touch bitter.
  • Hot black and strong?
  • God, I need to watch Airplane! again.
  • I like my women like I like my filesystems: FAT and 32.
  • One thing that Joe and I likely have in common is that none of the geeky girls on here would want to date old guys like us! Which is kind if sad because geeky girls that are our age are very rare...
    Someone please tell me that I'm not as unattractive as Steve before I killself. Seriously - even if it's just an obvious lie designed to spare my feelings. I need to hear this now or I'm going to do something drastic. I was already feeling overly vulnerable and this is threatening to send me over the edge.

  • edited November 2011
    I like my women like I like my filesystems: FAT and 32.
    +1
    One thing that Joe and I likely have in common is that none of the geeky girls on here would want to date old guys like us! Which is kind if sad because geeky girls that are our age are very rare...
    Someone please tell me that I'm not as unattractive as Steve before I killself. Seriously - even if it's just an obvious lie designed to spare my feelings. I need to hear this now or I'm going to do something drastic. I was already feeling overly vulnerable and this is threatening to send me over the edge.

    As a straight male who has never seen a picture of you but who has heard your lawyer voice in that one podcast we did, you definitely sound like a handsome, handsome man. I've never heard Steve's voice or seen a picture, so I'm just going to assume that you are indeed more attractive unless further data is provided.
    Post edited by WindUpBird on
  • I don't really mind age. Just as long as they're not younger than me
  • edited November 2011
    One thing that Joe and I likely have in common is that none of the geeky girls on here would want to date old guys like us! Which is kind if sad because geeky girls that are our age are very rare...
    Someone please tell me that I'm not as unattractive as Steve before I killself. Seriously - even if it's just an obvious lie designed to spare my feelings. I need to hear this now or I'm going to do something drastic. I was already feeling overly vulnerable and this is threatening to send me over the edge.

    As a straight male who has never seen a picture of you but who has heard your lawyer voice in that one podcast we did, you definitely sound like a handsome, handsome man. I've never heard Steve's voice or seen a picture, so I'm just going to assume that you are indeed more attractive unless further data is provided.
    Thank you. I have removed the shotgun barrel from my mouth and have placed it aside . . . for now.


    Post edited by HungryJoe on
  • I'm surprised no one has posted this one yet
  • I think there should be a new branch of porn aimed exclusively at geeks and nerds. No overly muscled jock types. No impossibly beautiful blondes who have obviously had Michael Jackson levels of plastic surgery. Backdrops would include computer labs, chemistry labs, spaceships, libraries, comic book shops, etc. What do you think?
    No money in it. Nerds are the ones who see the porn and not the adds.
  • Not a question of attractiveness but age.
  • I think one of my requirements, as extreme as it may be, would be requiring the girl to like or at least get along with my parents.

    I feel that this i reasonable in my case because my parents are pretty damned awesome, and if I go out with a girl they don't get along with, it's more likely because of a failure of judgement on my part than on theirs.
  • I think one of my requirements, as extreme as it may be, would be requiring the girl to like or at least get along with my parents.

    I feel that this i reasonable in my case because my parents are pretty damned awesome, and if I go out with a girl they don't get along with, it's more likely because of a failure of judgement on my part than on theirs.
    It's a pretty reasonable requirement. I don't think it'd be tough to fulfill. It certainly make your life much easier.
  • This is not necessarily one of my requirements, as my mom can be a leeeettttleee crazy sometimes.
  • I think one of my requirements, as extreme as it may be, would be requiring the girl to like or at least get along with my parents.

    I feel that this i reasonable in my case because my parents are pretty damned awesome, and if I go out with a girl they don't get along with, it's more likely because of a failure of judgement on my part than on theirs.
    It's a pretty reasonable requirement. I don't think it'd be tough to fulfill. It certainly make your life much easier.
    It's a really good requirement.

    A shame my mother's too judgmental. I don't want to intro anyone to her, unless they want to end up hurt or hating me because of her. it's happened.
  • I think one of my requirements, as extreme as it may be, would be requiring the girl to like or at least get along with my parents.
    I agree with this one, since my parents are also easy to get along with (as long as politics don't come up). However, with my first girlfriend, a completely different outcome occurred that led to problems. She fell in love with my mom so much that she would bitch me out for not spending enough time with (and money on) my mom. As has been said on the forum plenty of times, don't stick it in crazy.

    I don't really have to make a real list since my current girlfriend is pretty much the closest to my ideal that I've ever found in a person, but these are some things that have stuck out as things that I've appreciated.

    1) First and foremost, be someone who can be independent and doesn't have a problem with being on their own for a long time.
    2) Be clean in all aspects of life. This includes personal hygiene, eating habits, personal space maintenance (i.e. clean room/apartment), etc. Don't care about word choice or sense of humor, I actually prefer vulgar there.
    3) Have a good amount of common interests. Doesn't have to be everything, but enough to have things to do together. And also don't belittle or oppose things that I do enjoy and you don't.
    4) Has to like cats. I have one, I'm not getting rid of her.
    5) Know thyself. And don't bother criticizing me and attacking my character until you do. Nothing will make me dislike you faster than this.
  • I was going to say "be Adam." However, since this is for a dream lover, he would need to be Adam, be able to fly, and have an immense fortune (most of which is dedicated to charitable causes). The ability to stay up past 8:00 p.m. would rock, too. ^_^
  • I'm beginning to believe that the best mate would be a virtual one you could buid/program and relate to in a world like Snow Crash or Ready, Player One. What's the counter-argument? That s/he wouldn't be real? It might sound trite, but don't we "fall in love" with idealizations anyway?

    I'd be totally fine with a virtual mate that wouldn't get mad, wouldn't get old, wouldn't get sick, etc. We could maybe have a virtual kid who wouldn't mess himself, wouldn't sass back, wouldn't get in trouble, and would be admitted to virtual MIT on full scholarship.
  • You don't really love someone unless you have at some point fantasized about killing them in extravagant fashion. Therefore my dream lover must not be able to pick the lock to the gun safe.
  • You don't really love someone unless you have at some point fantasized about killing them in extravagant fashion.
    It will be... most memorable.

    /Prince of Nothing
  • I'm beginning to believe that the best mate would be a virtual one you could buid/program and relate to in a world like Snow Crash or Ready, Player One. What's the counter-argument? That s/he wouldn't be real? It might sound trite, but don't we "fall in love" with idealizations anyway?

    I'd be totally fine with a virtual mate that wouldn't get mad, wouldn't get old, wouldn't get sick, etc. We could maybe have a virtual kid who wouldn't mess himself, wouldn't sass back, wouldn't get in trouble, and would be admitted to virtual MIT on full scholarship.
    I don't know. A little bit of imperfection and unpredictability makes things interesting. I like Rym because he is a full person who is not and never will be totally under my control. I think that if I knew everything my boyfriend would do, I would be bored. If they stuck to a script that I came up with, even if it was a very nice script, I wouldn't have the funniness of hearing a random story I didn't know about or failing at something together. Also, would the program actually be an independent AI? Any self aware individual that can make its own decisions will do unexpected, possibly negative things. I have no problem with the idea of human/AI love, but if that AI is not completely independent, it is basically a sex slave with no will. I do think that an AI would be more patient and calm, because it would lack the impulsive hormone flooded brain that causes much rash action (Testosterone driven aggression, heightened emotion responses linked to sex hormones.)
    You need to get into dating sims. I recommend LovePlus for you.
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