I'm a kickass molecular biologist comedian. Writing? I do that too. Oh, you like board games and journalism? Look at your man, now back at me. I wrote a Lego Space Combat game and am applying to journalism school. I'm on a horse with a saddlebag full of MD/PhD apps.
Watch me drink all your drinks and make your woman laugh in ways that make you confused and envious. Listen to my tales of far-flung lands and wish you'd been to far-flung lands. Is your girl's bike broken? I will fix the shit out of it and then we will ride to Amsterdam on a fucking rainbow.
Here's a bottle of homebrewed beer and a jar of homemade sauerkraut. That's right, I do shit with my hands, but I'm courteous. Oh, you have a cold? Here, take this handkerchief I always have on my person. There's another one in my backpack full of shit for the App Trail thruhike I'm planning.
BRB starting a Krautrock band with one of my improv friends.
Also my dick shoots lasers its a thing British people have. Ask anyone over here and they say laser dick. Got an angry sprrow? Laser dick. Cockneys trying to steal you buttons? Laser dick. Making whinny post about the "Darkness of your soul"? Laser dick. You name a problem and laser dick will solve it.
Also my dick shoots lasers its a thing British people have. Ask anyone over here and they say laser dick. Got an angry sprrow? Laser dick. Cockneys trying to steal you buttons? Laser dick. Making whinny post about the "Darkness of your soul"? Laser dick. You name a problem and laser dick will solve it.
Anyway, I am a high school student crippled by the clique system and fear of problems that are already a problem. I spent 3 days in pre-tox (it's like detox, but you can be straight-edge and still get sent there). Admittedly, I'm best friends with the school's (former) dealer, but no one else involved knew it at the time. I tend to disappear into a land of Beatles, politics, history, and anime. I have a nasty habit of choosing Communtiy over community.
Though before you go about thinking I have low self esteem, I should also say that I am the youngest panelist at Anime Boston or Connecticon (to the best of my knowledge, though Lou or Rym might know something I don't), have a knowledge of historical trivia that eclipses that of many people who major in the field, rank in the 95th percentile of intellect nationally, and am an all around badass mothafuckah.
I spent 3 days in pre-tox (it's like detox, but you can be straight-edge and still get sent there). Admittedly, I'm best friends with the school's (former) dealer, but no one else involved knew it at the time.
I'm a socially well-adjusted geek who rolls his eyes at cynicism while still labelling himself as a skeptic. I fancy myself a creative person, and I'm quick to develop a big, fancy idea, but I rarely follow through, mostly because I never found a single craft that I was passionate enough to devote myself to. Still, I like to believe I'm improving in that. My energy levels tend to fluctuate rapidly, and you do not truly know me until you have seen me go on one of my super hyperactive, relatively sarcastic rants that people insist I must rehearse. Sometimes I get myself into awkward situations just for the fun of it.
I spent 3 days in pre-tox (it's like detox, but you can be straight-edge and still get sent there). Admittedly, I'm best friends with the school's (former) dealer, but no one else involved knew it at the time.
How did you manage that?
I was in the midst of a depressive episode, I was feeling masochistic and strangled myself. Put a rubber band around my neck and listened to Magical Mystery Tour. There's an easy "John Lennon and the Elastic Ono Band" joke to make here, but I can't quite find it. Since this was right after I was finally started on an SSRI, I felt I could trust the establishment to take care of me and told my dad. Obviously, that didn't end well. I was later told I got high off it. I don't have any experience in the field, but I didn't feel any different.
The whole place was fucked up -- not just in that way where it's filled with mental patients, but also the administration was incompetant. I almost got out without seeing anything depraved, because therapy was suggested, but completely optional. I slept straight from breakfast to lunch on my second day there, and the only thing anyone had to say about it was "did you have a nice nap, Greg?" The only thing they required was that you eat your food.
I spent my entire time in my room, listening to the Beatles (it was the beginning of my obsessive listening to the 60s and 70s, and they were the only band pre-Nirvana on my iPod) and reading a mix of My Antonia and Kafka's Amerika. My roommate had the same "just wait it out" philosophy, so we got along just fine.
Making whinny post about the "Darkness of your soul"?
Fuckin' emo ponyfags.
Is your girl's bike broken? I will fix the shit out of it and then we will ride to Amsterdam on a fucking rainbow.
You can only leave on a rainbow. We don't allow people to come in on them. Otherwise we'd be constantly blinded by fucking rainbows everywhere, as if we weren't fabulous enough already.
You forgot about the part where I'm so black that I absorb black holes. It's kinda like how heat averages out over time in space instead of being in one concentrated part. Colour does the same thing.
I believe morality comes from society rather than religion, our govt. can stand to be a bit more socialist and that the concept of a god is the worst invention man has ever created.
The best invention is low calorie delicious desserts.
Comments
You may disagree, but watch me be awesome long enough and you'll start being and doing awesome too. I am the awesome-enabler.
Or do I mean awful? I always get those two mixed up.
Watch me drink all your drinks and make your woman laugh in ways that make you confused and envious. Listen to my tales of far-flung lands and wish you'd been to far-flung lands. Is your girl's bike broken? I will fix the shit out of it and then we will ride to Amsterdam on a fucking rainbow.
Here's a bottle of homebrewed beer and a jar of homemade sauerkraut. That's right, I do shit with my hands, but I'm courteous. Oh, you have a cold? Here, take this handkerchief I always have on my person. There's another one in my backpack full of shit for the App Trail thruhike I'm planning.
BRB starting a Krautrock band with one of my improv friends.
There is nothing else you need to know.
Also my dick shoots lasers its a thing British people have. Ask anyone over here and they say laser dick. Got an angry sprrow? Laser dick. Cockneys trying to steal you buttons? Laser dick. Making whinny post about the "Darkness of your soul"? Laser dick. You name a problem and laser dick will solve it.
Nine is not a cat but catboy. Get it right!
Anyway, I am a high school student crippled by the clique system and fear of problems that are already a problem. I spent 3 days in pre-tox (it's like detox, but you can be straight-edge and still get sent there). Admittedly, I'm best friends with the school's (former) dealer, but no one else involved knew it at the time. I tend to disappear into a land of Beatles, politics, history, and anime. I have a nasty habit of choosing Communtiy over community.
Though before you go about thinking I have low self esteem, I should also say that I am the youngest panelist at Anime Boston or Connecticon (to the best of my knowledge, though Lou or Rym might know something I don't), have a knowledge of historical trivia that eclipses that of many people who major in the field, rank in the 95th percentile of intellect nationally, and am an all around badass mothafuckah.
The whole place was fucked up -- not just in that way where it's filled with mental patients, but also the administration was incompetant. I almost got out without seeing anything depraved, because therapy was suggested, but completely optional. I slept straight from breakfast to lunch on my second day there, and the only thing anyone had to say about it was "did you have a nice nap, Greg?" The only thing they required was that you eat your food.
I spent my entire time in my room, listening to the Beatles (it was the beginning of my obsessive listening to the 60s and 70s, and they were the only band pre-Nirvana on my iPod) and reading a mix of My Antonia and Kafka's Amerika. My roommate had the same "just wait it out" philosophy, so we got along just fine.
And I've heard of kids doing the "choking game" to get some effects but I suspect that's not what you were going for.
The best invention is low calorie delicious desserts.