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Bad Puns

SailSail
edited June 2008 in Everything Else
What do you call a sacrilegious bone?

A BLAS-femur!
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Comments

  • whateverwhatever
    What does the conversational goose suggest be eaten instead when he is threatened?

    Ah-spare-a-goose.

    My friend has a book of jokes from 1915 called 1,700 Conundrums Worth Knowing. It's pretty fantastic.
  • DkongDkong
    Everything in this article: http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/06/06/the-50-best-pun-stores/
    Except replace "best" with "facepalm worthy".
  • whateverwhatever
    Everything in this article:http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/06/06/the-50-best-pun-stores/
    Except replace "best" with "facepalm worthy".
    I feel bad laughing at these.
  • DkongDkong
    edited June 2008
    I feel bad reading that list...<_<.
    The two pubic hair references are especially distasteful, and I'm a person who rarely, if ever, gets offended by anything.

    Also, what the hell is the merchant of tennis? That's the only one on the list that I don't understand.
    Post edited by Dkong on
  • OmnutiaOmnutia
    I think they are quite witty.
  • RymRym
    Also, what the hell is the merchant of tennis? That's the only one on the list that I don't understand.
    Ever hear of The Merchant of Venice? Oh, wait, you're the one who doesn't read...
  • Li_AkahiLi_Akahi
    edited June 2008
    When you exit the boat, you will notice a dock on your left and a dock on your right, we call that a pair-a-docks.
    Post edited by Li_Akahi on
  • DaveDave
    Everything in this article:http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/06/06/the-50-best-pun-stores/
    Except replace "best" with "facepalm worthy".
    List fails because it doesn't have the best named restaurant in Philly (maybe the world): Pho Shizzle.
  • ladyobsoleteladyobsolete
    edited June 2008
    When you exit the boat, you will notice a dock on your left and a dock on your right, we call that a pair-a-docks.
    I sorta like that one.
    Post edited by ladyobsolete on
  • RochelleRochelle
    List fails because it doesn't have the best named restaurant in Philly (maybe the world): Pho Shizzle.
    Nice. There is a restaurant in Seattle called What the Pho.
  • AprecheApreche
    In MidTown Manhattan near Penn Station there is a place called Pow Wok.
  • VigaViga
    ;_; I'm bad punless.
  • gomidoggomidog
    Pow Wok.
    I ate there the other day.
  • TheWhaleSharkTheWhaleShark
    I wonder how many coffee shops out there are named "The Daily Grind?" There's at least one near me.
  • Kate MonsterKate Monster
    Why do people always groan at puns? I find them cute, clever, and funny.
  • ......
    Why do people always groan at puns? I find them cute, clever, and funny.
    One only groans at the bad ones. One laughs at the actually clever puns.
  • Kate MonsterKate Monster
    Why do people always groan at puns? I find them cute, clever, and funny.
    One only groans at the bad ones. One laughs at the actually clever puns.
    The bad ones are the best ones! They are so bad and ridiculous, that they are just funny! It is like fart humor... it is easy and stupid, but somehow its simplicity adds to its humor.
  • AprecheApreche
    Hoof Arted?
  • DkongDkong
    Hoof Arted?
    Mike Hunt?
    Why do people always groan at puns? I find them cute, clever, and funny.
    Because...actually, I dunno why. Something about seeing "Thai Tanic" just makes me kinda...feeling like I wanna groan.
  • VigaViga
    I'm not sure if this counts as a pun but it was very dumb and kinda funny.

    Bad girl friend: Man, she's way to fat to play DDR.
    Cutesy friend: Maybe she plays on HEAVY mode.
    (pause)
    (laughter and making fun of the dumbness)
  • Kate MonsterKate Monster
    That is not a pun.
    pun
    - noun 1. the humorous use of a word or phrase so as to emphasize or suggest its different meanings or applications, or the use of words that are alike or nearly alike in sound but different in meaning; a play on words.
    2. the word or phrase used in this way.
    –verb (used without object) 3. to make puns.
  • StarfoxStarfox
    Easy with the ad homonym attacks there.
  • Kate MonsterKate Monster
    Easy with the ad homonym attacks there.
    How is that an ad homonym attack?
  • lackofcheeselackofcheese
    edited June 2008
    I think he meant puns in general.
    It didn't exactly work since there wasn't an ad hominem attack per se, but it was still funny.
    Post edited by lackofcheese on
  • edifolco25edifolco25
    edited June 2008
    I remember getting this in an email a few years ago and it still remains one of my favorite pieces of word play.
    Everyone know about Gandhi?
    Well, there are a few things you might not know about this spiritual man.
    For one, he always walked around barefoot and his poor feet were always hard and thick.
    Also, because he fasted so often he was extremely frail and weak.
    Also, because of that diet, he had horrible horrible breath.
    So basically, one could say that Gandhi was a "super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis".


    Of course then there's the one where I ask, "have you heard on the news how the police are the lookout for midget psychic? He's a small medium at large."
    Post edited by edifolco25 on
  • thaneofcawdorthaneofcawdor
    What's the Italian word for sodomy?

    Innuendo.
  • SailSail
    What does Snoop Dog use to keep his whitests white?

    Bleayach!(Bleach + Biyach[Bitch])

    Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella everywhere?

    Fo' drizzle.
  • Josh BytesJosh Bytes
    These are great. My favorites are Thai me up, Sofa so good and A Salt & Battery
  • DkongDkong
    I kind of liked master bait and tackle...but that's as distasteful as the cubic hair and public hair ones...
  • Dr. TimoDr. Timo
    Dentists are good in battle, they demolarize the enemy.
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