I'm only saying that you shouldn't be so harsh with Mr. Sharp.
You're saying a lot more than that.
Mr. Sharp has since grown up, as he said, so I'm not going to ladle any criticism on him. He was one way, realized that it wasn't the way to be, and has since changed his ways. That's called "growing up."
The problem is that there are a large number of males who refuse to do this, and usually cite some bullshit like "I'm a guy, it's what I do" as a way to excuse their continued douchebaggery.
There are also many women who do this. A lot of people just never grow up. However, you can demand more of yourself, and very often you can change. You can't necessarily change every aspect of your personality, but you can certainly learn how to not lie to get sex.
Well, if you want to be totally serious and grown-up, sure, but you're harshing on what was supposed to be tongue-in-cheek comments. Maybe I should sprinkle some emoticons around, but I hate those things. I'm sorry if I offended you.
I'm only saying that you shouldn't be so harsh with Mr. Sharp.
You're saying a lot more than that.
Mr. Sharp has since grown up, as he said, so I'm not going to ladle any criticism on him. He was one way, realized that it wasn't the way to be, and has since changed his ways. That's called "growing up."
The problem is that there are a large number of males who refuse to do this, and usually cite some bullshit like "I'm a guy, it's what I do" as a way to excuse their continued douchebaggery.
There are also many women who do this. A lot of people just never grow up. However, you can demand more of yourself, and very often you can change. You can't necessarily change every aspect of your personality, but you can certainly learn how to not lie to get sex.
To me, people glorifying sex, and being immature about it, are much like kids with toy guns. Look at some kids who have parents that let them have toy guns. They think it's not such a big deal, whatever. Now bring some kids over for playtime who have parents that won't allow pretend weapons as toys. Those kids will glorify those toys, and play with them to the exclusion of much else.
In other words, the cure for being stupid about sex and relationships is to actually get some.
Wise, mature advice from the guy who doesn't have a girlfriend.
Be that as it may, Scott is more of an equalist than many others. He cares about things being fair, and seeks to avoid generalizations. He refuses to lie, and refuses to date someone just for the sake of dating someone, stating that there must be an intellectual bond before he will even consider dating a girl.
I'm only saying that you shouldn't be so harsh with Mr. Sharp.
You're saying a lot more than that.
Mr. Sharp has since grown up, as he said, so I'm not going to ladle any criticism on him. He was one way, realized that it wasn't the way to be, and has since changed his ways. That's called "growing up."
The problem is that there are a large number of males who refuse to do this, and usually cite some bullshit like "I'm a guy, it's what I do" as a way to excuse their continued douchebaggery.
There are also many women who do this. A lot of people just never grow up. However, you can demand more of yourself, and very often you can change. You can't necessarily change every aspect of your personality, but you can certainly learn how to not lie to get sex.
To me, people glorifying sex, and being immature about it, are much like kids with toy guns. Look at some kids who have parents that let them have toy guns. They think it's not such a big deal, whatever. Now bring some kids over for playtime who have parents that won't allow pretend weapons as toys. Those kids will glorify those toys, and play with them to the exclusion of much else.
In other words, the cure for being stupid about sex and relationships is to actually get some.
You're right, but that's also a little too optimistic. I've known plenty of people who haven't had problems getting relationships and sex, but they've had plenty of difficulty learning anything about them. Immature people really tend to stay immature for a while; they don't like to admit mistakes, so they don't learn from them. Some people are really just stupid.
joe: I'm not offended, you just raised my ire, in much the same way that a popped collar raises my ire. I've seen too many good people in stupid situations for stupid reasons, and it raises both my sympathy and my dislike for other people. When people make bullshit excuses for their asshole behavior, I like to call out the bullshit and force the truth out of them. I don't care that they did it, I just care that they're HONEST about it. If you're up front about who you are, nobody can really get mad at you for being what you are.
Question for the girls: So if a guy tells girl that he likes the girl but the girl tells him that she is seeing. Do you think the girl will feel awkward around the guy, even if the guy only want to be friends with her now?
Maybe at first, but if they are really friends then that awkwardness will go away eventually. There were some guys who I had crushes on but once the crush went away we were just chillin' and being cool.
Somewhat random question: What would you say are the top three downsides of having breasts? In addition, how does the off handed "Well I like you and if you'd like to go out some time give me a call." make girls feel?
I am not woman but from the medical perspective, if they are too big is a bad thing.
I recently watched AMV Hell 1 for the first time, nuff said.
That part was whoa huh.
1. If I don't wear a bra they will sag as I age. 2. I need a bra or they will hurt from running, jumping, etc. 3. I had to tell guys to look up a few times.
Question for the girls: So if a guy tells girl that he likes the girl but the girl tells him that she is seeing. Do you think the girl will feel awkward around the guy, even if the guy only want to be friends with her now?
At first it weird but later it's cool like Gomi said. In my experience though the guy was awkward with for a long while. T_T
In addition, how does the off handed "Well I like you and if you'd like to go out some time give me a call." make girls feel?
If they do lets take it from there. If he doesn't he's not really worth it for me. However if it was a guy I truly cared about then I'd be a little miffed but it's not like I haven't said this myself to someone so I feel alright again.
No, but a guy will, under the right circumstances, lie, cheat, or steal to get someone in the sack.
That's a generalization that always makes me extremely mad.
I'd personally replace guy with human, but otherwise I can't disagree. The important bit is "under the right circumstances". If a person claims that this is false, they are claiming that a guy will not, under any conceivable circumstances, lie, cheat, or steal to get someone in the sack. This seems a much harder thing to prove than Joe's statement.
Couldn't you see the make-up and such which (some) women put on while on the pull as the equivalent to a man claiming he's a lawyer? Surely in both cases the individual is trying to make themselves seem more like what they believe the opposite sex wants them to be than they truly are? The man has to be more underhanded about it because it's not socially acceptable for us to put paint on our faces.
Obviously in an ideal world we will meet people and show them exactly who they are and then start a relationship with them. However in practice in certain situations, (ie clubs, pubs etc.) where the aim is to enjoy coitus that evening, therefore without getting to know the person that well appearances inevitable count, and it seems women prefer lawyers, just as men prefer ''made-up'' women.
I think it's all fair game in such circumstances as both parties know full well what is going on, you just can't expect it to lead to anything meaningful after the act.
No, but a guy will, under the right circumstances, lie, cheat, or steal to get someone in the sack.
That's a generalization that always makes me extremely mad.
I'd personally replace guy with human, but otherwise I can't disagree. The important bit is "under the right circumstances". If a person claims that this is false, they are claiming that a guy will not, under any conceivable circumstances, lie, cheat, or steal to get someone in the sack. This seems a much harder thing to prove than Joe's statement.
But that's the same as saying I would do anything under the right circumstances: kill, jump off a building or buy 100 apples. I guess what really bothers me is that some women (or girls) seem to think every guy is a creep somewhere, just trying to get them to have sex.
I guess what really bothers me is that some women (or girls) seem to think every guy is a creep somewhere, just trying to get them to have sex.
Definitely very frustrating. It would be much better if everyone would just be honest with one another, and if you didn't have to deal with the suspicions and problems left by someone else that came before you. This is especially difficult if their concerns are good ones, but not as dramatic. Like maybe yes you want to have sex with them, but you weren't planning on manipulating them or lying or anything like that.
That's actually one of the things that I've found attractive about geek culture; the geeks I've met may be offensive, or arrogant, or socially inept, but they're rarely genuinely deceptive. I will say though that the few exceptions to that rule (mostly geeks that have snapped and become misogynists, or social engineers who had it bleed out from their cracking and into their personal lives) have been frightening in their knack for it. I sort of see it as the "what if geeky engineers became terrorists" bit from Scrym's podcast of a while back.
Couldn't you see the make-up and such which (some) women put on while on the pull as the equivalent to a man claiming he's a lawyer?
Surely in both cases the individual is trying to make themselves seem more like what they believe the opposite sex wants them to be than they truly are?
You could, and you would not be incorrect in my opinion.
Obviously in an ideal world we will meet people and show them exactly who they are and then start a relationship with them.
Or have sex with them and then never speak again, provided that that was what was mutually agreed upon. :P
However in practice in certain situations, (ie clubs, pubs etc.) where the aim is to enjoy coitus that evening, therefore without getting to know the person that well appearances inevitable count, and it seems women prefer lawyers, just as men prefer ''made-up'' women.
I think it's all fair game in such circumstances as both parties know full well what is going on, you just can't expect it to lead to anything meaningful after the act.
The biggest problem with this is that not everyone goes into it that way, so sometimes earnest people get caught and hurt in the process. I agree with the whole "don't hate the player, hate the game" philosophy, but that doesn't necessarily mean that a person should just give up on things.
Girls lie, too. Girls can be so evil sometimes, its scary. No wonder this thread started with talking about how complicated they are. But of course I'm talking about a certain population of girls, and people that say guys are jerks are only talking about a certain population of guys. Of course we know not everyone is like that. But I think guys who lie to get laid and girls who stab each other in the back are meant for each other. The rest of us find people we really care about and fall in love.
Girls lie, too. Girls can be so evil sometimes, its scary. No wonder this thread started with talking about how complicated they are. But of course I'm talking about a certain population of girls, and people that say guys are jerks are only talking about a certain population of guys. Of course we know not everyone is like that. But I think guys who lie to get laid and girls who stab each other in the back are meant for each other. The rest of us find people we really care about and fall in love.
I really don't understand the stereotype of men not understanding women. This is a myth caused by an artificially produced gender dichotomy. The differences lie solely in the biological. We are socialized in general from a young age to believe that men and women are different in all other regards. If you were to go to a country that has not yet had an industrial revolution, you will find that there is no dichotomy. My sociology professor told my classmates and I a story about a colleague who witnessed a man break into a woman's house in Papua-New Guinea. After the man was kicked out by the woman, the colleague asked her if she was afraid she would be raped. She was not familiar with the concept of rape, and when told, thought it would be easier for a woman to rape a man.
I am gloriously flat chested, a fact which makes me rather happy. I suppose it depends on how big they are, but the three downsides I can think of right off the bat. 1. They bounce when you run. I really flatten my chest so I can run faster. 2. There is a bias against taking your shirt off in the park in summer or wearing only swim trunks at the shore. When I come home from running, the first thing I want to do is take off my shirt. I hate having to cover up my chest! Why don't guys have to? 3. They get tender from time to time, like when they are growing or random stuff like if you drink too much coffee and red bull. I remember being a teenager and playing soccer and everytime I would stop the ball with my chest it was like ACCHAAAAAAa!
"Well I like you and if you'd like to go out some time give me a call." make girls feel?
Good way to go about it, I think. This is essentially how Rym asked me out.
I really don't understand the stereotype of men not understanding women. This is a myth caused by an artificially produced gender dichotomy. The differences lie solely in the biological. We are socializedin generalfrom a young age to believe that men and women are different in all other regards.
Yes! This is my belief too! People on the forum made fun of my when I said that although there are biological differences, gender is a mostly an idea fabricated by society. Yay, back up!
@No.2: Please take no offense but, the fact that this has never been mentioned should go in the Scrym=Gay thread. It is fun to be semi-naked sometimes. Well I never suspected them to be all that useful but I think combined with whole menstruation thing, being a guy is physically better. I still think hormones and behavior effect guys worse but I have only ever been a guy.
I want to be as strong as a guy, but there are many things I like about having a girls body. Not having to shave my face in the morning, for one thing, or having chest hair. I also like that I don't have pain!!! when I get hit in the groin by something.
What would you say are the top three downsides of having breasts?
1) You can't lie on your front for very long. 2) If you wear baggy clothes for a long time, and then suddenly dress up in tighter clothes, it's a shock to look down and go, "When did -those- things get there?" 3) Good bras are expensive and often need special washings to make them last longer.
I want to be as strong as a guy, but there are many things I like about having a girls body. Not having to shave my face in the morning, for one thing, or having chest hair. I also like that I don't have pain!!! when I get hit in the groin by something.
I wouldn't mind the hairyness of being a guy myself.. and actually, depending on the angle, a girl can be dropped by a hit to the crotch - like, for example, sparring with a smaller person, and them missing your pad thing with a rather hard kick. That hurt a lot.
I have to put in my "two cents" so to speak. I have had a few girlfriends in the past that actually have said that they like me because I'm "nerdy". I just have a problem with being in long relationships I guess. Most of my relationships end after a few months, and usually not by me. Is there any advice anyone one would care to share on being more relationship oriented? I like many geek things, and wonder if that is why I seem to get dumped all the time. Maybe there is some kind of proper relationship etiquette that I am unaware of at this time.
If you were to go to a country that has not yet had an industrial revolution, you will find that there is no dichotomy. My sociology professor told my classmates and I a story about a colleague who witnessed a man break into a woman's house in Papua-New Guinea. After the man was kicked out by the woman, the colleague asked her if she was afraid she would be raped. She was not familiar with the concept of rape, and when told, thought it would be easier for a woman to rape a man.
Comments
Mr. Sharp has since grown up, as he said, so I'm not going to ladle any criticism on him. He was one way, realized that it wasn't the way to be, and has since changed his ways. That's called "growing up."
The problem is that there are a large number of males who refuse to do this, and usually cite some bullshit like "I'm a guy, it's what I do" as a way to excuse their continued douchebaggery.
There are also many women who do this. A lot of people just never grow up. However, you can demand more of yourself, and very often you can change. You can't necessarily change every aspect of your personality, but you can certainly learn how to not lie to get sex.
In other words, the cure for being stupid about sex and relationships is to actually get some.
/sarcasm
joe: I'm not offended, you just raised my ire, in much the same way that a popped collar raises my ire. I've seen too many good people in stupid situations for stupid reasons, and it raises both my sympathy and my dislike for other people. When people make bullshit excuses for their asshole behavior, I like to call out the bullshit and force the truth out of them. I don't care that they did it, I just care that they're HONEST about it. If you're up front about who you are, nobody can really get mad at you for being what you are.
In addition, how does the off handed "Well I like you and if you'd like to go out some time give me a call." make girls feel?
1. If I don't wear a bra they will sag as I age.
2. I need a bra or they will hurt from running, jumping, etc.
3. I had to tell guys to look up a few times. At first it weird but later it's cool like Gomi said. In my experience though the guy was awkward with for a long while. T_T If they do lets take it from there. If he doesn't he's not really worth it for me. However if it was a guy I truly cared about then I'd be a little miffed but it's not like I haven't said this myself to someone so I feel alright again.
Obviously in an ideal world we will meet people and show them exactly who they are and then start a relationship with them. However in practice in certain situations, (ie clubs, pubs etc.) where the aim is to enjoy coitus that evening, therefore without getting to know the person that well appearances inevitable count, and it seems women prefer lawyers, just as men prefer ''made-up'' women.
I think it's all fair game in such circumstances as both parties know full well what is going on, you just can't expect it to lead to anything meaningful after the act.
That's actually one of the things that I've found attractive about geek culture; the geeks I've met may be offensive, or arrogant, or socially inept, but they're rarely genuinely deceptive. I will say though that the few exceptions to that rule (mostly geeks that have snapped and become misogynists, or social engineers who had it bleed out from their cracking and into their personal lives) have been frightening in their knack for it. I sort of see it as the "what if geeky engineers became terrorists" bit from Scrym's podcast of a while back.
1. They bounce when you run. I really flatten my chest so I can run faster.
2. There is a bias against taking your shirt off in the park in summer or wearing only swim trunks at the shore. When I come home from running, the first thing I want to do is take off my shirt. I hate having to cover up my chest! Why don't guys have to?
3. They get tender from time to time, like when they are growing or random stuff like if you drink too much coffee and red bull. I remember being a teenager and playing soccer and everytime I would stop the ball with my chest it was like ACCHAAAAAAa! Good way to go about it, I think. This is essentially how Rym asked me out.
Well I never suspected them to be all that useful but I think combined with whole menstruation thing, being a guy is physically better. I still think hormones and behavior effect guys worse but I have only ever been a guy.
2) If you wear baggy clothes for a long time, and then suddenly dress up in tighter clothes, it's a shock to look down and go, "When did -those- things get there?"
3) Good bras are expensive and often need special washings to make them last longer. I wouldn't mind the hairyness of being a guy myself.. and actually, depending on the angle, a girl can be dropped by a hit to the crotch - like, for example, sparring with a smaller person, and them missing your pad thing with a rather hard kick. That hurt a lot.