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How to ask a girl out...

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  • I can't believe this thread even exists, my illusion that Geeknights listeners are primarily adults is shattered. You damn breeders.
    I'm 14, and I'm a year younger than everyone in my grade level.
  • I'm 14, and I'm a year younger than everyone in my grade level.
    You shouldn't be asking anyone out. You can't even shave yet. Your job right now is to get the best grades you possibly can so that you can get a scholarship to a decent college. Girls can wait. You'll be much more attractive to them when you're older.
  • edited October 2008
    I'm 14, and I'm a year younger than everyone in my grade level.
    You shouldn't be askinganyoneout. You can't even shave yet. Your job right now is to get the best grades you possibly can so that you can get a scholarship to a decent college. Girls can wait. You'll be much more attractive to them when you're older.
    Yeah, seriously. Get smart, then get sexy. Don't mix up the order.
    When your brain, your mouth, and your loins work together in harmony, there will be a relationship.
    Ghandi is rolling in his grave right now.
    Post edited by Victor Frost on
  • I'm 14, and I'm a year younger than everyone in my grade level.
    You shouldn't be askinganyoneout. You can't even shave yet. Your job right now is to get the best grades you possibly can so that you can get a scholarship to a decent college. Girls can wait. You'll be much more attractive to them when you're older.
    I very much disagree.
  • I'm 14, and I'm a year younger than everyone in my grade level.
    You shouldn't be askinganyoneout. You can't even shave yet. Your job right now is to get the best grades you possibly can so that you can get a scholarship to a decent college. Girls can wait. You'll be much more attractive to them when you're older.
    I very much disagree.
    Take it from the Adults, Don't rush growing up. It''s the only time you get it and you'll have the rest of your life to worry about relationships.
  • edited October 2008
    I wasn't really getting at being an adult. Having fun and gathering experiences is something one should definitely do as a kid and as a teenager. Getting good grades is important, but by no means the most important thing in your life.

    I'm not referring solely to asking someone out.. ^_~

    Though then again, what do I know. I'm just a "teen" myself..
    Post edited by kiwi_bird on
  • Take it from the Adults, Don't rush growing up. It''s the only time you get it and you'll have the rest of your life to worry about relationships.
    QFT.

    I was once envious of the girls who had relationships throughout all of middle school and high school. I had two classmates (twin sisters) that were always in relationships. They were bright, popular, pretty, and overall nice girls.

    After high school I would still hang out with them along with other various circles of friends. I remember one time one of them was single for over a month. That probably hasn't happened to her for a long time. She seemed to be miserable every time I saw her when she was single. She never seemed to enjoy just hanging out with friends and being herself.

    I then realized that the only time I ever saw her happy was when she had a boyfriend. This girl who I once envied and was jealous of, now looked kinda sad and pathetic.

    We were never really close friends, but we were nice to each other. I remember later on she hooked up with one of the guys in our post-high school circle of friends. He joined the Marines. She followed him to California, they got married, now they have 2 kids.

    Now, I'm not saying that anyone here is like that, however I will say: Don't be like that. Don't waste your youth wanting to have something that you will have more than enough time for when you get older.
  • Getting good grades is important, but by no means the most important thing in your life.
    Actually, they ARE the most important thing in your life right now; or at least, you should consider them as such if you want to be successful in adult life.

    You will live most of your life as an adult. During that time, you will engage in serious dating. You'll also have to worry about keeping a job, paying the mortgage, taxes, paying the light bill, etc. You have ONE responsibility as a kid, and that is to do well in school. Focus on that so your adult life will be easier and more fun.
  • Take it from the Adults, Don't rush growing up. It''s the only time you get it and you'll have the rest of your life to worry about relationships.
    QFT.

    I was once envious of the girls who had relationships throughout all of middle school and high school. I had two classmates (twin sisters) that were always in relationships. They were bright, popular, pretty, and overall nice girls.

    After high school I would still hang out with them along with other various circles of friends. I remember one time one of them was single for over a month. That probably hasn't happened to her for a long time. She seemed to be miserable every time I saw her when she was single. She never seemed to enjoy just hanging out with friends and being herself.

    I then realized that the only time I ever saw her happy was when she had a boyfriend. This girl who I once envied and was jealous of, now looked kinda sad and pathetic.

    We were never really close friends, but we were nice to each other. I remember later on she hooked up with one of the guys in our post-high school circle of friends. He joined the Marines. She followed him to California, they got married, now they have 2 kids.

    Now, I'm not saying that anyone here is like that, however I will say: Don't be like that. Don't waste your youth wanting to have something that you will have more than enough time for when you get older.
    I had those feelings back in school too. It was like you weren't important or attractive or anything if you couldn't get a boyfriend. I remember everyone thought I was too ugly to ever get a boyfriend. I would envy the girls who got dates and boyfriends anytime they wanted and I would just get with someone to avoid being the odd one out. Then as I got older it all seemed stupid and I just went for someone if I liked them and felt like it.
  • Sometimes you might get the feeling "Man, I need to get a girlfriend" but, in truth, just getting back in contact with your friends is what you were actually seeking.
  • @ HungryJoe
    I started going on dates when I was 13 and going steady at 15. There is nothing wrong with asking a girl out at 14. Just realize that the person you are dating is probably not the love of your life and your are good to go.
  • @ HungryJoe
    I started going on dates when I was 13 and going steady at 15.
    Yeah, well, girls are more mature about that stuff and can handle it better.
  • edited October 2008
    @ HungryJoe
    I started going on dates when I was 13 and going steady at 15.
    Yeah, well, girls are more mature about that stuff and can handle it better.
    But they are dating guys of the same age... so they should all be lesbians?
    Post edited by Kate Monster on
  • @ HungryJoe
    I started going on dates when I was 13 and going steady at 15.
    Yeah, well, girls are more mature about that stuff and can handle it better.
    But they are dating guys of the same age... so they should all be lesbians?
    Ummmm . . .
  • Getting good grades is important, but by no means the most important thing in your life.
    Actually, theyAREthe most important thing in your life right now; or at least, you should consider them as such if you want to be successful in adult life.

    You will live most of your life as an adult. During that time, you will engage in serious dating. You'll also have to worry about keeping a job, paying the mortgage, taxes, paying the light bill, etc. You have ONE responsibility as a kid, and that is to do well in school. Focus on that so your adult life will be easier and more fun.
    I must say I disagree, but I choose not to discuss this with HungryJoe. I am not a fan of the way he discusses things on this forum and would not find enjoyment from doing so. I feel bad for posting this, since I do not want to upset HungryJoe nor discuss this with him, but I want those kids reading to know that not everyone agrees with this post.

    Please understand that I believe there are other things more important then grades in a child's life.
    ...I do not believe that anything is more important the learning, but grades =/= learning. You must also learn from life, and to do so sacrifices grades.
  • But they are dating guys of the same age... so they should all be lesbians?
    Now, now there. Jii-san might be very, very old and very, very mature, but you are still asking this question to a man.
  • edited October 2008
    But they are dating guys of the same age... so they should all be lesbians?
    ....and dating older guys isn't an option?
    Actually, they ARE the most important thing in your life right now; or at least, you should consider them as such if you want to be successful in adult life.
    I know many people on this forum who disagree with that. I disagree with it, too. They should be important to you, but not the most important thing in your life. The most important thing in your life should be learning (and not always at school), making friends, and having positive life experiences.

    Personally, I think 14 might be a little young. I asked a girl out at the end of 7th grade (13 at the time). We didn't really hang out much, so it doens't really even count. I'd advise waiting until high school.
    Post edited by Dkong on
  • having positive life experiences
    That's what you should aim for.

    Dating/ having a girlfriend in your youth can be wonderful, but also aggravating. At the very least you gather new experiences which will help you once you are older.

    I, for my part, can say that I'm very introvert and like to be by myself a lot. But still there isn't anything that makes me happier then when my girlfriend and I talk. It most probably isn't going to be the "love of my life", but it makes getting through dull days a lot easier.
  • Speaking as one who entered high school a year young, I say it is fine to have relationships (I myself had 2 successful ones). School is more about preparing for society than actually going to class and learning, and relationships are a part of that. If you can, go for it, but if you want to wait, that's fine too. Don't think "oh, I'm too young" or "oh, I'm not ready". You're going to be almost as young and just as unprepared as you are now if you wait.
  • Listen, Skyshiro, most people who tell you grades don't matter did not make very good grades. It's a sour grapes thing. Try getting into Cornell by writing that you "learned a lot about life" on your application.

    Look at Mosquitoboy. It's pretty obvious from his grammar what his grades must be like. Do you want to be like him? Then study and forget the girls for a couple of years.
  • But they are dating guys of the same age... so they should all be lesbians?
    ....and dating older guys isn't an option?
    Not old enough to make any real difference in maturity level. ^_~
  • Listen, Skyshiro, most people who tell you grades don't matter did not make very good grades. It's a sour grapes thing. Try getting into Cornell by writing that you "learned a lot about life" on your application.

    Look at Mosquitoboy. It's pretty obvious from his grammar what his grades must be like. Do you want to be like him? Then study and forget the girls for a couple of years.
    Dude, I put grades in the front of everything I do, I really really want to get in USC or UCLA, because I live right be them, I had high hopes for an Ivy League, then I what one of my friends had to do to get in Yale and I was like fuck this.
  • Just remember that Hungry Joe = your high school math teacher.
    Take it with a grain of salt. Studying is very important, but so is enjoying yourself and basking in the glow of youth and endless possibilities.
  • edited October 2008
    Try getting into Cornell by writing that you "learned a lot about life" on your application.
    Try getting a decent job coming out of a community college or an open admission college.
    Oh wait, you can.
    Post edited by Dkong on
  • edited October 2008
    Listen, Skyshiro, most people who tell you grades don't matter did not make very good grades. It's a sour grapes thing. Try getting into Cornell by writing that you "learned a lot about life" on your application.

    Look at Mosquitoboy. It's pretty obvious from his grammar what his grades must be like. Do you want to be like him? Then study and forget the girls for a couple of years.
    Even though I completely disagree, he does have a point. "I really really want to get in USC or UCLA, because I live right be them, I had high hopes for an Ivy League, then I what one of my friends had to do to get in Yale and I was like fuck this."

    Nonetheless, you should be able to get all A's and still have pleeenty of excess time for relationships or sports or whatever you want to do. If grades are your entire life, you won't be able to function in college away from your parents. There you have some classes to go to and for which to study, but the remaining time will most likely be spent with friends and hopefully girls. The true answer to this argument is that if you want to have relationships and good grades in high school, moderation is key.
    Post edited by Mr. Eric on
  • edited October 2008
    Dating advice on a Geek orientated forum. ROFL!

    I think the slight anonymity of the forum with guys and girls makes it prone to these type of questions. Perhaps Rym and 'Emily!' (and maybe Scott too), should do a show to answer all those questions for the dating inclined. Personal stories + advice = Great Show!
    Post edited by CHOIS CHOIS CHOIS on
  • I met my wife in a college cafeteria 10 years ago on Nov. 6. I still remember the first thing I said to her: "Hi. You have the prettiest eyes I've ever seen. Would you mind if I sit with you?" It wasn't a line. I couldn't stop looking at her.
  • I met my wife in a college cafeteria 10 years ago on Nov. 6. I still remember the first thing I said to her: "Hi. You have the prettiest eyes I've ever seen. Would you mind if I sit with you?" It wasn't a line. I couldn't stop looking at her.
    If I said that to a girl, she'd give me that big eyed OMG look, and walk away with at a slightly brisk pace.
  • If I said that to a girl, she'd give me that big eyed OMG look, and walk away with at a slightly brisk pace.
    You don't know until you try, do you? The trick is to say what you mean.

    Dressing well is also surprisingly important.
  • That made me "awww".
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