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Sarcastic Haiku

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  • Maddow crinkle brow
    Olberman smirks and stokes
    Pundits that I 'ship
  • Obama is Prez
    Undoing all Bush's Fail
    Go. Obama, go!
  • We wait patiently
    to see the falling footwear
    some part stays hopeful.
  • Game Theory Homework
    Cournot Duopoly shit
    Get me out of here
  • edited January 2009
    Game theory is good
    It is a very cool science
    And a good album
    Post edited by Walker on
  • edited January 2009
    Oh peanut butter!
    Can't shake that Salmonella.
    Shitty times for all.
    Post edited by TheWhaleShark on
  • I am the master
    Of writing top notch haikus
    If only I could count.
  • Shumai is cooking
    Listening to Psychostick
    Things are quite silly
  • Teh sexyness is here
    But boyfriend is tired now
    No good night for me
  • Aspect ratios
    Some desire utility
    Others are just snobs
  • Ah, the philistines
    they deride haughty film fans
    and love mangled art
  • edited January 2009
    A dumb argument
    The stupidest I have seen
    Please, get over yourselves

    Enjoy Movie - Paramount
    Aspect Ratio
    Completely Irrelevant.
    Post edited by Churba on
  • edited January 2009
    Here on Internet,
    All business be serious,
    Just on Internet.

    Trying to think of a word that changes syllables when you pronounce it wrong..
    Post edited by Omnutia on
  • Trying to think of a word that changes syllables when you pronounce it wrong..
    A-pre-che is one
    Or you could say it A-praysh
    A-presh is fine too.
  • Japanese class soon
    Drills, dialogues, all must know
    Not studied since last class
  • Ruben #
    That De-Coster #
    Horay, Octothorpes
  • Been sick all this week,
    Just read American Gods,
    I feel better now.
  • Reading more Manga
    Eighthundredfifty chapters
    Need Fighting Spirit
  • Rym asks a question
    What is his power level?
    Over nine thousand?!!?
  • Enjoying metal
    The German variety
    Rammstein receives win.
  • Final Fantasy
    One, two, three and eleven
    It's all good. Kinda.
  • Final Fantasy
    I find it repetitive
    All the same to me.
  • edited April 2009
    I'm doing Script Frenzy at the moment, and the style of writing is getting to me. I need to reboot my muse with some hardcore Haikus.

    I have written novels
    But screenplays are different
    I must show, not tell

    I cannot direct
    Parentheticals, no good
    It is very frustrating

    More cinematic
    That is an upside for sure
    Movies in my head

    More dialogue too
    Talking about this and that
    Shut up, for god's sake

    Alternately:

    I'm writing a screenplay for fun.
    But I've only got so much done
    My characters suck
    They're stupid as fuck
    My mind is being undone

    Or:

    I wrote two novels in long summers past
    Inspiration flowed like water from me
    While you fools may call those old works half-assed
    You don't know the half, there is more to see
    In the infinitely arrogant way
    That all artists pursue their sordid craft
    I was taken by an idea one day
    I did not realize that it was so daft
    "I'll write a screenplay" I said with much glee
    I started to write with flame in my eye
    Flame from my fingers, on a writing spree
    Now I am trapped in this creative sigh
    But I will keep working as hard as I can
    I hope I'll be able to find out a plan

    Perhaps a little of this:

    Yo, It's the MC Walker up in the house! I'm about to drop some hot, steamy knowledge on your fool asses, so listen up!

    Yo, yo...

    I'm the man with the plan
    With a mic in my hand
    A pen in my fingers and a fetish for Japan

    I write this shit like you wouldn't even believe
    The haters can hate, but just look what I achieve

    Pure hard-core creative prose mastery
    That's why people think my words are so dastardly

    So don't dare clash with me, I'll rip you to pieces
    Your stature diminishes, my intensity increases

    And now I'm writing movies, can't argue with that!
    I'll shoot that shit like bullets out a gat

    I'll create a story with nothing but facts
    No emotional cues save the action to the max!

    I'll only use parentheticals when i really need to
    I'll keep my story tight and my formatting true

    But more than anything else you just heard me spit
    I'll keep on making this hard core shit 'till I quit

    ...Bitches.

    And, as a finale:

    Script writing is always quite a good time
    Cool as it is, I tend to prefer rhyme
    Rap and Hip Hop, acrostics and sonnets
    Intertwining words be the bee in my bonnet
    Pure wordplay, emotion in just one word
    Terror and sadness, happiness and birds

    Fearlessly, though, I will keep on writing
    Reading, learning, working and fighting
    Endlessly creative in my plot lines
    Never ceasing in creating all kinds
    Zero in my goal, one hundred pages!
    Yes, my script will go down through the ages
    !


    ...I got a little carried away there, didn't I? Oh well, I actually feel much better about writing that script now.
    Post edited by Walker on
  • Metroid on my head
    There's a metroid on my head.
    Dear god, get it off.
  • These haikus are great,
    Fun while you're otherwise bored,
    I'm not too clever. :(
  • I drank root beer and
    Gran Gala today, gave birth
    To drunk Tootsie Roll.

    Yeah, I don't think it counts though. That recipe is the truth though.
  • Everything is pink!
    Dear god, Someone make it stop.
    I'm so high right now.

    I can't feel my tongue.
    Or anything else really.
    Where are my nostrils?

    These are odd haikus
    Oh look, no more 5th wall.
    Oops, guess I broke it.
  • ......
    edited December 2009
    What is this bullshit?
    Haikus running on the loose?!
    Jesus fucking Christ.
    ...I got a little carried away there, didn't I? Oh well, I actually feel much better about writing that script now.
    Do I know the outline of this script? o3o?

    EDIT: BACK TO BAD HAIKU AND COCKS!

    Apreche-ate dick.
    Gomidog sits in between.
    Rym Neils Obama.
    Post edited by ... on
  • Apreche-ate dick.
    What the hell, seriously? That's just wrong. Apreche has only 2 syllables.
  • Ultimate freedom
    Leads to
    Ultimate Thunderdom
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