Scott just needs a girl as arrogant and geeky as him. They exist; I personally know a few.
They would bicker during sex, that's not good, bicker sex? Really?
Scott loves bickering. All he needs is a girl who also loves bickering, so that they can just bicker all day and then convert it to furious sexual energy and romance at night.
Scott loves bickering. All he needs is a girl who also loves bickering, so that they can just bicker all day and then convert it to furious sexual energy and romance at night.
Can anyone reccomend some good example of romance in fiction (Also some bad ones so I can see the difference.)? While I doubt it compares well to actually experiencing romance, I don't think "Need girlfriend for book research." is going to go over too well.
Sex is fun and feels good. The same is true for board games, video games, and roller coasters. Why is any more important than the others? I guess sex is also exercise, but video games and board games are exercise for the brain. Roller coasters exercise the digestive tract.
You know. I had this exact same mindset you know...until I finally had sex.
Can anyone reccomend some good example of romance in fiction (Also some bad ones so I can see the difference.)? While I doubt it compares well to actually experiencing romance, I don't think "Need girlfriend for book research." is going to go over too well.
I think Whisper of the Heart has a very honest romance going on in it. They are kids sure, but they act like kids their ages would instead of all the pre-teen, immature, bullshit, stereotypes we see Hollywood or any other related industry churn out.
...And all of a sudden we spent an afternoon cuddling. My only regret is that now my clothes smell like her and it's driving me a tad crazy. Life's good.
There are some days where Reddit's kinda OK, and some days where a Redditor nails everything about a subject spot-on and without flinching.
The thing that makes me feel most alienated on reddit is the incessant references to wanting to kiss a girl, "forever alone", "HEY LOOK THIS GUY HAS A GIRLFRIEND" and all this bullshit putting women up on pedestals like they're some kind of celestial beings that aren't full of concerns and insecurities like everyone else.
I'm a nerdy geeky dude, always have been. I've never been particularly attractive, pretty average. Before I lost weight, I was pretty fat too.
But I still dated a small handful of girls, and I'm married to the girl I've been with for 7 years. Everyone I know at work is either married, in a serious relationship, or getting back into dating after a divorce. I don't know any "forever alone" types except on reddit. I just can't relate at all, having a significant other is just a normal, everyday part of life for me, but the reddit demographic seems obsessed with getting a girlfriend.
Sometimes it completely makes me feel like an outsider, like I don't belong on reddit somehow.
EDIT: Since I'm probably going to get downvoted for what I typed above anyway, I wanted to add another observation I've had. The world is about 50/50 men and women. Polygamy isn't widespread. That means that there's a girl out there for nearly every "forever alone" guy. I don't know any now, but I knew some "forever alone" type geeks when I lived on the Computer Interest Floor in college (I told you I was a nerd). EVERY SINGLE ONE of those guys thought that they were just a geek who girls crapped on and treated poorly, but in actuality they were simply unwilling to date chubby girls or weird girls. They claimed "I like weird girls" but what they meant was they were into hot girls who wore glasses or green highlights in their hair. The "forever alone" guys were some of the most judgemental I knew. Every girl wasn't hot enough, or was "too stupid" because they said one thing that the geek guy thought made her look dumb (like you've never said something stupid), or she didn't like the right kind of movies or music or video game.
I can't help but feel like a lot of the "forever alone" stuff on reddit is the same thing. Super judgemental guys who are feeling sorry for themselves that a super hot genius didn't fall out of the sky and into their laps. Reddit has tons of threads where a picture of a girl is posted, and she's instantly objectified or mocked. Every thread with a "my girlfriend said so and so" has a ton of responses that say to dump her. Dump her, for one imperfection? The level of misogyny is staggering for a community where so many of its members are sad they don't have girlfriends. Find a thread where a girl is posting and admits she's overweight. Go make a thread about how your girlfriend wants a diamond engagement ring, or a designer purse, and watch how many redditors post about how she's superficial and dumb for buying into society's bullshit. These normal, perfectly dateable women just aren't good enough for the high-and-mighty redditor.
"Forever alone" guys, for whatever reason, seem to think they're some kind of major catch. A diamond in the rough waiting to be discovered by a beautiful, intelligent woman. The truth is, you probably aren't the great a catch. In fact, if you think you are, you're probably kind of a dick. You have flaws, so you have no business being too good for a girl with flaws. I think the thing that describes a lot of "forever alone" guys perfectly is actually from the movie The Social Network, where Jesse Eisenberg's girlfriend tells him he's going to go through his life thinking girls don't like him because he's a nerd, but it's actually because he's an asshole.
Sorry, rant over. Been feeling this way for a while, and this thread brought it out of me.
I suddenly feel motivated to see what that girl who recognized my Miku wallet is doing this weekend.
This just goes hand in hand with that other thing from Reddit. Just treat girls like other humans, and you will get on well with them.
edit: Yes, on second reading, this article is very good! I am not a millionaire supermodel, so I don't date millionaire supermodels. I am an tomboyish, relatively attractive, slightly worried geek girl, dating an effeminate, relatively attractive, devil-may-care geek boy, and I think I am pretty dang happy about it. These fat annoying fanboys who seem to want a super-smart porn actress for their girlfriend are deluded and cheating themselves out of happiness. They need to find a fat otaku girl with whom they can curl up and watch anime.
Reading things like this mostly just makes me happy that I'm persistent enough to not let rejection get me down, open enough to see the beauty in women all shapes and sizes, and smart enough to carry on a long, intelligent conversation with pretty much any girl, no matter her background or field of study.
I am not a millionaire supermodel, so I don't date millionaire supermodels. I am an tomboyish, relatively attractive, slightly worried geek girl, dating an effeminate, relatively attractive, devil-may-care geek boy, and I think I am pretty dang happy about it.
Actually, interesting thing about this, I remember reading an article about a study where they found that people are generally most attracted to other people who have a similar level of attractiveness. Wish I could find it.
I am not a millionaire supermodel, so I don't date millionaire supermodels. I am an tomboyish, relatively attractive, slightly worried geek girl, dating an effeminate, relatively attractive, devil-may-care geek boy, and I think I am pretty dang happy about it.
Actually, interesting thing about this, I remember reading an article about a study where they found that people are generally most attracted to other people who have a similar level of attractiveness. Wish I could find it.
I saw a TV documentary about that. Apparently it's not so much similar to their actual level of attractiveness, more like how attractive they perceive themselves.
Not really dating related, but here's a situation I'd like to get some opinions on.
So, let's say you have this friend. You've known this friend for a long time, say... 10 years. Now, he's (yes, it's a he friend) had this girlfriend for a long time, around 5-6 years of the time you've known him. Their relationship has had some rough parts, they've broken up a couple times, but eventually they decided to get it together and stick with each other for the long haul (leading to marriage at some point).
Now let's talk about your situation in this. You've known your friend's girlfriend for a long time, but you don't really hang out much since you live far away from them, and have since they met. Yet, she still has a huge attraction to you. You don't really realize this until three years in when they have their big break up. You and her chat a lot, and she is effectively rebounding off of you, even though there is no physical interaction, which leaves it all just a thought, nothing actually takes place. This continues to go on for a while even after they get back together, but eventually it does come to a halt.
Now fast forward a couple years, and you've maintained contact with the two because you are friends and nothing seems to have really changed. You hang out and have good times. But then... you suddenly end up in a situation where you are visiting them and it's the end of the night. You're hanging out on the couch, just relaxing to wear off some of the booze before bed, when she comes out of the bedroom and sits down next to you. She then precedes to inform you that she got permission from her significant other to perform certain acts for you, if you get my drift.
Keeping in mind that you did have a virtual sexual relationship with her for a good year or so, and that you know she never lost those feelings for you entirely...
What do you do? Yes or no?
(Yes, obviously this is based on real life, and I know what I did in this situation, just curious to know what others think)
Well, if you're interested, you should probably confirm that the significant other is fine with this (since the girlfriend could be lying), and then it's all cool whatever you do.
Well, if you're interested, you should probably confirm that the significant other is fine with this (since the girlfriend could be lying), and then it's all cool whatever you do.
Ditto that - If you hear it directly from him or get some confirmation along those lines, then full steam ahead. If not, fuck no.
She then precedes to inform you that she got permission from her significant other to perform certain acts for you, if you get my drift.
I would definitely sit down with both of them and hash out the ground rules in no uncertain terms. Ask to do so. If she refuses, saying it's unnecessary, I would not proceed.
I would definitely sit down with both of them and hash out the ground rules in no uncertain terms. Ask to do so. If she refuses, saying it's unnecessary, I would not proceed.
This, All open relationships must be preceded with a discussion of what is out of bounds, and inbounds! Getting that out of the way gets rid of a lot of worry and lets you get straight into the rompage ^^
She then precedes to inform you that she got permission from her significant other to perform certain acts for you, if you get my drift.
I would definitely sit down with both of them and hash out the ground rules in no uncertain terms. Ask to do so. If she refuses, saying it's unnecessary, I would not proceed.
@theknoxinator I would say no no matter what. Seriously...Why? This is a stupid idea. I don't care whether the male significant other agrees or not, doing anything with this woman would be stupid. Anyone saying that going on ahead once you had his permission is kinda dumb. As xkcd points out, even in trying to make sex simple and not mean anything, people are complicated.
don't care whether the male significant other agrees or not, doing anything with this woman would be stupid. Anyone saying that going on ahead once you had his permission is kinda dumb. As xkcd points out, even in trying to make sex simple and not mean anything, people are complicated.
But why not go for it and live a little? What's the worst case scenario? You lose two friends?
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edit: Yes, on second reading, this article is very good!
I am not a millionaire supermodel, so I don't date millionaire supermodels. I am an tomboyish, relatively attractive, slightly worried geek girl, dating an effeminate, relatively attractive, devil-may-care geek boy, and I think I am pretty dang happy about it.
These fat annoying fanboys who seem to want a super-smart porn actress for their girlfriend are deluded and cheating themselves out of happiness. They need to find a fat otaku girl with whom they can curl up and watch anime.
So, let's say you have this friend. You've known this friend for a long time, say... 10 years. Now, he's (yes, it's a he friend) had this girlfriend for a long time, around 5-6 years of the time you've known him. Their relationship has had some rough parts, they've broken up a couple times, but eventually they decided to get it together and stick with each other for the long haul (leading to marriage at some point).
Now let's talk about your situation in this. You've known your friend's girlfriend for a long time, but you don't really hang out much since you live far away from them, and have since they met. Yet, she still has a huge attraction to you. You don't really realize this until three years in when they have their big break up. You and her chat a lot, and she is effectively rebounding off of you, even though there is no physical interaction, which leaves it all just a thought, nothing actually takes place. This continues to go on for a while even after they get back together, but eventually it does come to a halt.
Now fast forward a couple years, and you've maintained contact with the two because you are friends and nothing seems to have really changed. You hang out and have good times. But then... you suddenly end up in a situation where you are visiting them and it's the end of the night. You're hanging out on the couch, just relaxing to wear off some of the booze before bed, when she comes out of the bedroom and sits down next to you. She then precedes to inform you that she got permission from her significant other to perform certain acts for you, if you get my drift.
Keeping in mind that you did have a virtual sexual relationship with her for a good year or so, and that you know she never lost those feelings for you entirely...
What do you do? Yes or no?
(Yes, obviously this is based on real life, and I know what I did in this situation, just curious to know what others think)
I would say no no matter what. Seriously...Why? This is a stupid idea. I don't care whether the male significant other agrees or not, doing anything with this woman would be stupid. Anyone saying that going on ahead once you had his permission is kinda dumb. As xkcd points out, even in trying to make sex simple and not mean anything, people are complicated.