Why do I get the feeling people are saying dating is synonymous with sex? ... To assume dating and sexing are the same, I think, is a little off.
Of course the spectrum is vast and unbound. For the majority of people (over a reasonable age... say 18), they tend to go hand in hand. You ask most people, and I would think they would say, that if you're dating someone, you're probably having sex, and if you're having sex with someone regularly, you're probably going to date them sooner or later. Society just makes that the norm, so people will assume that until told otherwise.
You ask most people, and I would think they would say, that if you're dating someone, you're probably having sex, and if you're having sex with someone regularly, you're probably going to date them sooner or later. Society just makes that the norm, so people will assume that until told otherwise.
I'm curious if this applies to the comments being made by Churba et al.
Why do I get the feeling people are saying dating is synonymous with sex?
I don't say that, but let's face it, most of the time if you're dating someone, it's rather more likely you'll be having sex with them at some point, rather than not.
I'm curious if this applies to the comments being made by Churba et al.
Not always. I've started dating people I was regularly having sex with, I've also just kept it down to casual sex. I've dated people and not had sex with them, and I've dated people and had sex with others(with permission, I don't cheat, that shit just isn't on.) Can't speak for anyone else, and I'm not sure why it's "Churba et al" and not someone else.
I've started dating people I was regularly having sex with, I've also just kept it down to casual sex. I've dated people and not had sex with them, and I've dated people and had sex with others(with permission, I don't cheat, that shit just isn't on.)
Me too.
Can't speak for anyone else, and I'm not sure why it's "Churba et al" and not someone else.
I'm not sure why it's "Churba et al" and not someone else.
I was too lazy to go back a page to find the name of the instigator for this conversation. Your name was easier to remember. Nothing personal was meant by it.
So I went back through the thread (which was a very entertaining few hours, seeing all the old posts again), and didn't see this get discussed before. This is more aimed towards those who are in/have been in long-term relationships.
When do you think is the right time to profess your love to someone (I mean specifically going past really liking someone to saying "I love you")? How do you know you really love someone? Can you remember exactly when you knew that you loved your significant other (or ex)? I'm sure it's different for everyone here, so it'll be interesting to hear.
I was too lazy to go back a page to find the name of the instigator for this conversation. Your name was easier to remember. Nothing personal was meant by it.
Not always. I've started dating people I was regularly having sex with, I've also just kept it down to casual sex. I've dated people and not had sex with them, and I've dated people and had sex with others(with permission, I don't cheat, that shit just isn't on.) Can't speak for anyone else, and I'm not sure why it's "Churba et al" and not someone else.
I sometimes wish I was like you guys, really. Sex is never "just sex" for me. It's something which does not happen spontaneously, nor is it planned, but rather built upon. I mean, I guess I've never tried to just go and do it. In my years of sexual existence, not once have gone into sex with the goal of pleasing myself, so I need to have that mental connection with the person in order for the experience to be enjoyable for myself.
I sometimes wish I was like you guys, really. Sex is never "just sex" for me. It's something which does not happen spontaneously, nor is it planned, but rather built upon. I mean, I guess I've never tried to just go and do it. In my years of sexual existence, not once have gone into sex with the goal of pleasing myself, so I need to have that mental connection with the person in order for the experience to be enjoyable for myself.
It is nice to know that another man out there sees it the same way I do. I totally agree, Sir Mort.
I sometimes wish I was like you guys, really. Sex is never "just sex" for me. It's something which does not happen spontaneously, nor is it planned, but rather built upon. I mean, I guess I've never tried to just go and do it. In my years of sexual existence, not once have gone into sex with the goal of pleasing myself, so I need to have that mental connection with the person in order for the experience to be enjoyable for myself.
To be fair, there are also times where I wouldn't mind being a little closer to the general average. To never again have to explain that yeah, I fuck dudes too(also, that this does not mean that I'm gay and just trying to deny it, now that just shits me right off), that open relationships are not some weird thing that only sexual deviants do, that being kinky doesn't necessarily mean that I always enjoy being tied up, gagged and whipped by some angry woman in leather with a bad German accent, that hanging out with people I do have sex with from time to team doesn't mean that I'm going to necessarily have sex with them, that the fact I like having sex with someone means that I actually have a deep and abiding love for them or would prefer a relationship with them(let alone the fact that I have friends whom I have sex with that I wouldn't ever DREAM of dating, as we both already know it would end in tears, bitterness and cheap whiskey), or that just because I like one or two things they might consider a deviation from the mean, that I do not necessarily enjoy every other possible kink(side note, no breath play please, for both our safety, my default threat/panic response is not an orgasm, it is violence), that because I'm open and honest with discussing sexuality does not mean I'm some extraordinary pervert who can't help myself but to work myself into a frenzy just to get my end away, and so on, and so fourth.
Hell, the current relationship I'm in is the first one...well, ever where I've had a romantic relationship where these things are understood and accepted, rather than feared, misunderstood, despised, or whatever combination or addition you fancy to have. And if I fuck this up, there is indeed a larger possibility for me than there is for you that I shan't be able to have that again, due to the sheer broad scope of my sexuality and sexual proclivities. It ain't all green grasses and roses over here, not that you said or implied it was, but more to illustrate that both have their differences(I'd hardly even call them problems), and both are on equal footing.
Whatever gets you off, my friend, is the deal. If that is what you need for satisfaction, then that's what you need for satisfaction, and I'm not gonna judge you or have a go at you just because you don't fancy the idea of casual sex with a friend, or because you like to have a closed relationship over an open one, or whatever the hell is your business in that area, so to speak. While I draw the line at hurting others - at least, maliciously, if they get off on a bit of slap and tickle, that's a different thing to the hurt I'm speaking of - or at non-consent, uninformed consent, or that sort of thing. There is nothing wrong with the way you get your kicks, and there is nothing wrong with the way I get my kicks. Most of all, while we both have qualities we sometimes wished we possessed, what gets us off is what gets us off, and neither method is inherently better than the other or necessarily something to wish for over the other. Cumming is as cumming does, y'know? All you can really hope for is to land someone who lines up nicely with your own personal idea of a good time, whatever form that might take, and then you're off to the races, and all is well.
What? What are ya'll looking at me for? I get to be all wise and shit from time to time, too.
Comments
You can sex up folks you aren't dating, and date people you aren't sexing up.
You can be in an open relationship, where you are dating and sexing up one person, while also sexing up other people (but not dating them).
There is a whole spectrum and microcosm of this shit.
To assume dating and sexing are the same, I think, is a little off.
Where do I pull this shit out of?
When do you think is the right time to profess your love to someone (I mean specifically going past really liking someone to saying "I love you")? How do you know you really love someone? Can you remember exactly when you knew that you loved your significant other (or ex)? I'm sure it's different for everyone here, so it'll be interesting to hear.
Hell, the current relationship I'm in is the first one...well, ever where I've had a romantic relationship where these things are understood and accepted, rather than feared, misunderstood, despised, or whatever combination or addition you fancy to have. And if I fuck this up, there is indeed a larger possibility for me than there is for you that I shan't be able to have that again, due to the sheer broad scope of my sexuality and sexual proclivities. It ain't all green grasses and roses over here, not that you said or implied it was, but more to illustrate that both have their differences(I'd hardly even call them problems), and both are on equal footing.
Whatever gets you off, my friend, is the deal. If that is what you need for satisfaction, then that's what you need for satisfaction, and I'm not gonna judge you or have a go at you just because you don't fancy the idea of casual sex with a friend, or because you like to have a closed relationship over an open one, or whatever the hell is your business in that area, so to speak. While I draw the line at hurting others - at least, maliciously, if they get off on a bit of slap and tickle, that's a different thing to the hurt I'm speaking of - or at non-consent, uninformed consent, or that sort of thing. There is nothing wrong with the way you get your kicks, and there is nothing wrong with the way I get my kicks. Most of all, while we both have qualities we sometimes wished we possessed, what gets us off is what gets us off, and neither method is inherently better than the other or necessarily something to wish for over the other. Cumming is as cumming does, y'know? All you can really hope for is to land someone who lines up nicely with your own personal idea of a good time, whatever form that might take, and then you're off to the races, and all is well.
What? What are ya'll looking at me for? I get to be all wise and shit from time to time, too.