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Dating

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  • I've never really had a relationship longer than 1 month. It seems I just can't find a girl with which I can actually talk. This may sound arrogant, but a lot of the people I know are quite shallow.
  • I've never really had a relationship longer than 1 month. It seems I just can't find a girl with which I can actually talk. This may sound arrogant, but a lot of the people I know are quite shallow.
    Not good. I've been out with a girl or two that seemed not to be shallow at all but in the end they really were - that sucks, eh?
  • This may sound arrogant, but a lot of the people I know are quite shallow.
    That's how it was for me in high school. Once I left for uni, we formed the Front Row Crew, which is basically a large collection of non-shallow people. ^_~ Form your own tribe, and surround yourself with your true peers.
  • Form your own tribe, and surround yourself with your true peers.
    I guess that will be possible in university, not so much in "higher school".
  • I guess that will be possible in university, not so much in "higher school".
    The reason is that when you go to elementary, middle, and high school, the thing you have in common with all of the other students is geography. When you go to a non-state university, especially one that is called institute of art, institute of technology, etc., you actually share a common interest with most of the student body.
  • I guess that will be possible in university, not so much in "higher school".
    The reason is that when you go to elementary, middle, and high school, the thing you have in common with all of the other students is geography. When you go to a non-state university, especially one that is called institute of art, institute of technology, etc., you actually share a common interest with most of the student body.
    Yeah, I thought as much.
  • Here's a question. I just had an incredibly awkward and bumbling attempt at asking someone to prom. But the problem is, instead of saying no when like you're supposed to when an idiot makes a fool of himself like that, she said yes and the conversation ended rather abruptly and inconclusively.

    The next time I talk to her, do I
    a. mention it.
    or
    b. ignore it.
    If the conversation ended abruptly it might have had something to do with her sensing your nervousness, as a guess. Or she might have been nervous too, its not just guys that have confidence problems. Don't worry, you have to trust that she knew what she was doing when she said yes and be happy that you're going to the prom with someone you like. Heck, you might ask her on a date beforehand too if the prom isn't real soon.

    As an update for myself, it turns out the girl I asked out a while ago has been very busy recently, and will be leaving for Japan for three months next Wednesday. This might or might now have anything to do with my getting a no, but I'll probably try again in a few months if I'm still single when she gets back. At this point that seems likely but not certain.
  • I've never really had a relationship longer than 1 month. It seems I just can't find a girl with which I can actually talk. This may sound arrogant, but a lot of the people I know are quite shallow.
    Don't try to date girls you can't really talk to. If you're going to a "higher school" instead of a university, that's not AS good, but it doesn't mean you won't be able to find someone interesting. There are interesting people everywhere -- you just have to know where to look. (My girlfriend's awesome, and she comes from pretty much the most horrible, town around here.) Like Scrym said, find people who share your interests. If they're not at your school, do something extracurricular. Whatever you like to do, get into a group or a class for doing it. And be patient.
  • If you're going to a "higher school" instead of a university, that's not AS good, but it doesn't mean you won't be able to find someone interesting.
    By "higher school" I meant the German equivalent to the American High School. I just called it "higher school" because in Germany high school is divided into 3 separate schools, of which "higher school" is supposed to be the "elite" one.
    I was pointing it out since you would think there would be smart people there. Anyway, I can't wait for uni. ^^
  • By "higher school" I meant the German equivalent to the American High School. I just called it "higher school" because in Germany high school is divided into 3 separate schools, of which "higher school" is supposed to be the "elite" one.
    I was pointing it out since you would think there would be smart people there. Anyway, I can't wait for uni. ^^
    Aaah...I thought you were referring to the type of college that's commonly referred to as "high school with ashtrays".
  • I would ROFL my pants off if the two studs, ScRym, were to do an episode about goils and and dating.
  • We were discussing doing something like this the other day, a show about crushes and dating. (Hahah! It could be called "Rym is a Friend to All Women" <- Touga quote) It seems like a lot of our listeners are high school kids with all the drama that implies, and we thought that having survived the social gauntlet that is high school, we could offer some insight.

    I also thought I could be on it to toss in my own two cents. I can't speak for all girls, but I know enough from my own experiences and the experiences my friends talk about to maybe give some good advice.
  • Please do a show on that! That would be awesome!
  • Please do a show on that! That would be awesome!
    Seconded.
  • I'd be interested to hear what they have to say, although the show would either need to specifically target high school relationships or actual relationships (no offense to the younger crowd). High school kids need advice on how to tell when your physics partner is digging you, or how to not faint when your crush asks you to the semi-formal. Those of us who have already experienced our shaky starts into the world of romance would be better served with advice on how to find people that you'll still want to be with in a year, ideas for dates, and how to identify non-optimal situations like one night stands (and how to act accordingly).

    I vote for the later: I need ideas on cute things to do with my girlfriend, as our first 'anniversary' is coming up soon.
  • edited June 2008
    Well, the "cute" factor all depends the combination of what she likes and what you are good at.
    If You are an artist, draw them something that relates to something they like to imagination. If you are a writer, write them the type of short story they would like. Don't make it lame and too mushy, base it on something that is close to her, some shared information between the two of you. If I remember correctly, you are one of the programmers on the board, correct? How about writing a little Python program that when you click a button, it prints out something to do with you guys, some kinda romantic thing. Put it on a flash drive and give it to her. Just think of a clever way to use your programming that would make her laugh or make her happy. I think that would be a "cute" idea.
    In general, it's best just to find the best combination between your interests that will lead to having a fun time on that date. Trying too hard is no good. It's gotta be natural, like hanging out. (Of course, Rym and my anniversary is New Years Eve, so we celebrate it no matter what.)
    Post edited by gomidog on
  • Or you could be mean and give her some sort of virus that can only be removed if she can answer five questions about you.

    Lusankya: Here honey, I wrote you this little piece of software.
    Lusankya's gf: What does it do?
    Lusankya: It shows how much we love and know each other.
    Lusankya's gf: What's your favorite color?
    Lusankya: Just type it in.
    Lusankya's gf: [typing] red. Why is my computer making that strange sound?
    Lusankya: You answered the question wrong. Right now the software is deleting your bank records.
    Lusankya's gf: WHAT???
    Lusankya: You better get the rest of the questions right...
  • edited June 2008
    One time my uncle infected our computer with a virus. On Purpose. For Christmas.

    Enclosed in his card was a CD. We put this in to the old mac (this was quite some time ago) our computer screen went blank, except for a timer, a bunch of wildly flashing Christmas lights, and a horribly off-key, drunken voice singing the words "Jingle Bell Christmas" over and over at the top of their lungs. We tried to reboot. This just started the timer over. We were wondering what would happen after the hour was up, what it would do to our machine after an hour of Jingle Bell Christmas, but when the timer got to zero, the computer rebooted, and it was life as usual. WTF? Worst Christmas Card Evah!
    Post edited by gomidog on
  • You could always write a virus that only outputs "I love you <3" from they keyboard.
  • Oooh, You've got the "Lovesick" virus.
  • edited June 2008
    In today's news, police have arrested a woman from the New York City area on charges of terrorism after the "I love you less than three" virus corrupted the drives of more than a quarter of the worlds computers.
    Post edited by Omnutia on
  • I met her in India during my travels.
    The moment I read this, I imagined you as a dapper British Adventure Hero, traveling the jungles of the Orient!
  • edited June 2008
    What are the worst and/or best pick-up lines you have ever heard (or said)?

    Worst: "You're a brainy chick, so you are gagging for it, right?"

    Best: (Said in an Scottish accent, with a bright smile while on the train to Oban) "I noticed you were reading The Great and Secret Show. I didn't know pretty girls could be [Clive] Barker fans."
    Post edited by Kate Monster on
  • What are the worst and/or best pick-up lines you have ever heard (or said)?
    I said to a guy at a con rave, "So, do you like sci fi?" It somehow worked. I don't get it.

    Worst pick up lines I hear on a semi regular basis:

    "Hey, shorty lemme holla at you!"
    "Hey miss lady! Going somewhere!"
    "You got a fine ass. wanna talk."
    and finally
    "(insert big words and paragraph that basically says let fuck sometime)" <-- can't remember all that was said.
  • I don't exactly know what I am required to say in order for you to have intercourse with me, but could we assume that I said all that? I mean essentially we are talking about fluid exchange right? So could we go just straight to the sex?
  • I was once on the receiving end of the "California Blond" mating call: "I'm so drunk..."
  • I don't exactly know what I am required to say in order for you to have intercourse with me, but could we assume that I said all that? I mean essentially we are talking about fluid exchange right? So could we go just straight to the sex?
    "A Beautiful Mind", I kind of likes his economics :D
  • edited June 2008
    Skim reading this page has been quite delightful. I have many stories from my own dating history that could be added but maybe the thread is a bit old. Just some advice:

    1. If you have to work hard at making a connection with someone it might lead to a few dates but after that the hard work spoils any companionship.
    2. In my personal experience, the batshit crazy girls are best in bed. They will ruin your life and leave you an emotional wreck for a year or so, but the sex is fantastic.
    3. The person on the internet might not be a real person. It could be someone who has just created a whole new personality for some sick game, and you are the victim. Again, this is only from personal experience, but from 10 years ago so might not be sound advice in this more ubiquitously connected world.
    4. Oh, don't tell a girlfriend you are breaking up with her for someone you are dating on the internet, especially if the internet girlfriend doesn't exist. And doubly especially if the real life girlfriend is of the batshit crazy variety. This is the "perfect storm" of dating disaster.
    5. No matter how batshit crazy a girl may be, when you are trying to break up with her, don't have sex with her, even if she threatens to kill herself if you don't. Just call the ambulance right away.
    6. Pertaining to point number 5, when preparing to break up with batshit crazy girl, do it in a public place where you can just walk away. Don't do it at your own house, especially if you care for your stuff. Also, broken glass hurts!

    Hmmm... let me try to get away from the bad ones...

    7. Fairytale romances happen.
    8. Starting a relationship with a 3 month road trip, and not having any trouble at all, is a good sign you are on to a good thing.
    9. Being able to do a weekly geeky podcast with your partner is a good sign you are compatible.
    10. Also, having no topic off limits and being honest makes things stress free.
    Eg. "Will we be together for ever and ever?"
    "Statisticly that is quite unlikely."
    "That's not very romantic."
    "I know, but this way I don't have to remember what I said next time you ask me, and if we do break up in the future I won't be a liar."
    (you get a point if you worked out it was me who asked my girlfriend the first question)

    11. Romance is in actions, not in words.
    12. Flowers work but trees are better.
    13. Be passionate about your partner and be passionate about something else, and let your partner be passionate about something else again.


    I'll leave it there for now.
    Post edited by Luke Burrage on
  • edited June 2008
    Also, having no topic off limits and being honest makes things stress free.
    This, I think, is one of the most important pieces of relationship advice you could ever get.
    Post edited by gomidog on
  • Also, having no topic off limits and being honest makes things stress free.
    This, I think, is one of the most important pieces of relationship advice you could ever get.
    Be sure to have this talk right away. It's much better to find out right away that the person in your life is also human.

    Why does the scene from Chasing Amy suddenly come to mind where we suddenly find out that the "lesbian" girlfriend was a total heterosexual sex machine in her teen years...
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