See, we need more people to have conversations like this. Our society makes it fine to say "my ankle is fucked right now: I'm taking some aspirin for that," yet stigmatizes the exact same conversation s/ankle/brain;s/apririn/prosac.
I can be candid to a fault. SOMETIMES it's good. :-)
Me too. Although, one time Travel Bitch got fussy and went "What is WRONG with you!?" With the disquieting serenity that only flat affect brings, I calmly replied, "Severe clinical depression and anxiety-panic disorders, all untreated."
I have never seen anyone so bitchy shut up so fast. It was enough to warm my cynical, diamond-hard heart.
Me too. Although, one time Travel Bitch got fussy and went "What is WRONG with you!?" With the disquieting serenity that only flat affect brings, I calmly replied, "Severe clinical depression and anxiety-panic disorders, all untreated."
I have never seen anyone so bitchy shut up so fast. It was enough to warm my cynical, diamond-hard heart.
Long story, but the super-abbreviated version is that WUB was traveling in europe, and one of his travel companions was selfish, thoughtless, and whiny. For a start.
Long story, but the super-abbreviated version is that WUB was traveling in europe, and one of his travel companions was selfish, thoughtless, and whiny. For a start.
See, we need more people to have conversations like this. Our society makes it fine to say "my ankle is fucked right now: I'm taking some aspirin for that," yet stigmatizes the exact same conversation s/ankle/brain;s/apririn/prosac.
I've always experienced the exact opposite. Maybe it's because I notoriously under-report symptoms, maybe it's because I've never been hurt too badly physically, but people worry about my mental health 5x more than physical.
Mostly it's down to empathy. Most people can understand what a foot pain feels like, but you try to explain to someone you have an inability to feel happy or positive and the first thing they equate it to is someone who's just grumpy.
Even if people can understand depression (or any other mental illness or mental non-illness thing), it's more complicated than just an x or not x thing. It's hard and takes genuine effort to understand another persons perspective and place. The vast vast majority of the time, it's perfectly fine and easier to just "skip" the complexity and simplify the rationale for other peoples actions. Even if you can understand "depression" in one form (say, your own), understanding what form and effect it has on another person is more difficult.
Even if you are a fairly empathetic person, understanding another persons problems on more than a cursory level requires either effort or experience. There's really no other way around that. You can fake it, or simplify it slightly by comparing it to something you understand... but either way it's complex.
Now, even with that said, there is some level of a point to the quick cursory reactions themselves as well. Sometimes the answer really is as simple and crude as, "Get over yourself" or "Laugh it off." But being able to sort out which ones that applies to is... an excercise for the reader. :P
Lexapro seems to be its own alarm clock. Except, instead of waking up to NPR, I wake up to nausea, jitters (like fever chills), and room-warping dizzyness. Awesome.
Anyone else go through something like this when starting an SSRI?
Lexapro seems to be its own alarm clock. Except, instead of waking up to NPR, I wake up to nausea, jitters (like fever chills), and room-warping dizzyness. Awesome.
Anyone else go through something like this when starting an SSRI?
My daughter had nausea and dizziness when she started and also when they raised the dose. She's on Celexa, 7.5mg I think. I know the dose is quite low. The psychologist we initially saw kept pushing for 20, but at 10 she was forgetting things every 10 minutes and zoning out midstep through a room, and so on.
Your dose might be too high. It depends on your symptoms and how much 'adjustment' you really need. My general (across the various specialists my daughter sees), anecdotal experience is that docs tend to overmedicate and most negotiation is downward, but, people on SSRIs and similar also tend to not want to take them.
It's a tough balance. Talk to your doctor about adjusting the dose and experimenting if the side effects don't get better. If he/she isn't open to it, find somebody else.
Doc is a family friend, I'm sure he'll listen. I'll give it a bit and see if I acclimate to this. I bounced back really fast after waking up this morning, much faster than yesterday.
Doc is a family friend, I'm sure he'll listen. I'll give it a bit and see if I acclimate to this. I bounced back really fast after waking up this morning, much faster than yesterday.
Tell him that at this dose, you've been shooting people with Mining Lasers... ;-P
If we're using minecraft as an analogy, without Lexapro, I'd have built a windowless obsidian box around myself and just stayed there. Mining laser combat is an improvement.
If we're using minecraft as an analogy, without Lexapro, I'd have built a windowless obsidian box around myself and just stayed there. Mining laser combat is an improvement.
We'll have you up to cliff-face elven dwellings in no time.
Two beers + Lexapro = Restless sleep, extremely vivid dreams, horrifying vertigo and nausea in the morning, and some memory issues (things seem to have happened too fast, or out of order).
I'm thinking about making a comic about what recently happened to me. Mostly because it helps to find the jokes in everything. I try to joke through the pain.
I spent the night in a hospital about two weeks ago. What I didn't tell people that this time around, it was a mental hospital. I tried to kill myself again on the 16th. The cops took me DC General. It's the worst hospital in the city and dirtiest hospital I've ever seen. Never go there. It's more or less a prison hospital since it's on the same campus as the prison. It's mental facilities is like prison-light.
My friends showed up with Jed that night to talk to me till visitor time was over. I also saw a Doctor and got evaluated. I sat through 12 hours in the worst place I've even been in. Scary people. Dangerous people. Dirty facilities. Nurses who didn't treat my wounds. Enough to keep a girl from trying to die. Or to at least succeed at it! *ba dum pssh*
This was the third time in my life I felt that strongly to just do it. I'm going to be on medication soon. I feel like I failed myself and everyone I ever tried to cheer up before. I didn't think I would go back to how I felt when I started this thread.
Is is horrible to think things gotten better because of what I did? Things in my life that were pushing me to do this, have changed. Factors of uncertainty are now certain.
I feel pretty shameful, like a backslider in religion, because I tried again.
Many, if not most, people just don't understand this well enough to speak meaningfully about it. Most people I know who are not beset by problems with depression think that this is simply some sort of cry for attention. What they don't seem to want to understand is that there comes a point where the depression actually hurts. It sometimes hurts to draw in the next breath. The times that I've really felt like actually going through with it have been the times that I've physically hurt the worst. The thing that keeps me from doing it during those times is a strong focus on two things: (1) I've lived long enough to know that things can improve, and that improvement can mitigate the most painful physical symptoms, and (2) There are some people who rely on me to be there for them, and if I were suddenly gone, they would would find it very difficult.
I hope the above doesn't sound trite or stupid. It's just how I get through some very tough times.
Please remember and know that people here rely on you to remain well, Viga. We'd miss you dearly if you were gone.
I really hope you feel better Viga, feel free to open up about the situation. I think doing a any activity that allows you to interact with other people about your issues really helps out in a cathartic/getting-it-out-there type of way. I vlog about a few issues as well.
Comments
I have never seen anyone so bitchy shut up so fast. It was enough to warm my cynical, diamond-hard heart.
Even if people can understand depression (or any other mental illness or mental non-illness thing), it's more complicated than just an x or not x thing. It's hard and takes genuine effort to understand another persons perspective and place. The vast vast majority of the time, it's perfectly fine and easier to just "skip" the complexity and simplify the rationale for other peoples actions. Even if you can understand "depression" in one form (say, your own), understanding what form and effect it has on another person is more difficult.
Even if you are a fairly empathetic person, understanding another persons problems on more than a cursory level requires either effort or experience. There's really no other way around that. You can fake it, or simplify it slightly by comparing it to something you understand... but either way it's complex.
Now, even with that said, there is some level of a point to the quick cursory reactions themselves as well. Sometimes the answer really is as simple and crude as, "Get over yourself" or "Laugh it off." But being able to sort out which ones that applies to is... an excercise for the reader. :P
I need to do something productive today.
Anyone else go through something like this when starting an SSRI?
Your dose might be too high. It depends on your symptoms and how much 'adjustment' you really need. My general (across the various specialists my daughter sees), anecdotal experience is that docs tend to overmedicate and most negotiation is downward, but, people on SSRIs and similar also tend to not want to take them.
It's a tough balance. Talk to your doctor about adjusting the dose and experimenting if the side effects don't get better. If he/she isn't open to it, find somebody else.
Guess I quit drinking. Fuck.
I spent the night in a hospital about two weeks ago. What I didn't tell people that this time around, it was a mental hospital. I tried to kill myself again on the 16th. The cops took me DC General. It's the worst hospital in the city and dirtiest hospital I've ever seen. Never go there. It's more or less a prison hospital since it's on the same campus as the prison. It's mental facilities is like prison-light.
My friends showed up with Jed that night to talk to me till visitor time was over. I also saw a Doctor and got evaluated. I sat through 12 hours in the worst place I've even been in. Scary people. Dangerous people. Dirty facilities. Nurses who didn't treat my wounds. Enough to keep a girl from trying to die. Or to at least succeed at it! *ba dum pssh*
This was the third time in my life I felt that strongly to just do it. I'm going to be on medication soon. I feel like I failed myself and everyone I ever tried to cheer up before. I didn't think I would go back to how I felt when I started this thread.
Is is horrible to think things gotten better because of what I did? Things in my life that were pushing me to do this, have changed. Factors of uncertainty are now certain.
I feel pretty shameful, like a backslider in religion, because I tried again.
I hope the above doesn't sound trite or stupid. It's just how I get through some very tough times.
Please remember and know that people here rely on you to remain well, Viga. We'd miss you dearly if you were gone.