So if a girl gives me her number without having to ask, goes to a football game with me, invites me to a party, and then tells me that the plans have changed and that she is going to a different party, that's a good sign, right?
I've been flirting with a latino dude. I send him little messages from my closet, into his closet. I'm hoping to move into a double-wide closet with him soon.
I've been flirting with a latino dude. I send him little messages from my closet, into his closet. I'm hoping to move into a double-wide closet with him soon.
So if a girl gives me her number without having to ask, goes to a football game with me, invites me to a party, and then tells me that the plans have changed and that she is going to a different party, that's a good sign, right?
Just be careful. After that everything that has happened this weekend, it could just be out of kindness/pity/wanting to make sure everyone's okay and mutual being in the middle of issues. It's possible that under those pressures, you relate, but after some time together it won't go so well and she'll realize that it wasn't actually that kind of interest. Just don't get too invested too fast.
A conundrum of dating: scheduling dates with busy people is impossible. Dating non-busy people isn't worth the effort.
The following image may never have been more pertinent in the history of the internet:
What's wrong with wanting to be with people who have active lives and interests?
Nothing, but non-busy people, or people with very flexible schedules, can have incredibly active lives and interests. I've got a friend who is a radiologist. He only works two days per week but has three houses and travels all over the world. Different strokes for different blokes.
If you're so out there that literally nobody will spend time with you, it's definitely time to seek professional help.
If you're recently born and your parents die, or you're given for adoption; You wouldn't have had time to make any friends yet, there will be a period where no one will want to spend time with you. By your logic, would that child never again deserve anyone's attention?
If you're so out there that literally nobody will spend time with you, it's definitely time to seek professional help.
If you're recently born and your parents die, or you're given for adoption; You wouldn't have had time to make any friends yet, there will be a period where no one will want to spend time with you. By your logic, would that child never again deserve anyone's attention?
Nice job ignoring the context of the comment. You've got a career in politics!
You said "people refuse to spend time with you," not "you don't know anybody." Your scenario is flawed because even if you have living parents, there's still a period of time where you don't yet have friends. At some point, you have to be introduced to people.
That's not what we're talking about. We're talking about (young) adults who have interacted with the world and know people. If some of the people you know refuse to spend time with you, then you might know some dickish people. If absolutely everybody that you know refuses to spend time with you, there's almost assuredly something wrong with you; there could be something wrong with them too, but there's definitely a problem with you.
I suppose there could be an edge case where you just get shat on by absolutely every single human being you encounter, but that's so rare as to effectively not exist.
If you really think everyone you encounter is just shitting on you, yes, you actually have a problem and yes, you really need professional help.
Your scenario is flawed because even if you have living parents, there's still a period of time where you don't yet have friends. At some point, you have to be introduced to people.
Parents count as friends. New people would talk to you because you have parents. But alright. What if you move to a new country, and you talk to one dude. Like the hotel manager. And he hates your guts. Do you deserve being spoken to by new people then?
Parents count as friends. New people would talk to you because you have parents. But alright. What if you move to a new country, and you talk to one dude. Like the hotel manager. And he hates your guts. Do you deserve being spoken to by new people then?
He's not saying that if non of the people you KNOW won't hang out with you, you're a bad person. He's saying that if you (honestly) try, and cannot get people to hang out, then you need to look in the mirror.
Your scenario is flawed because even if you have living parents, there's still a period of time where you don't yet have friends. At some point, you have to be introduced to people.
Parents count as friends. New people would talk to you because you have parents. But alright. What if you move to a new country, and you talk to one dude. Like the hotel manager. And he hates your guts. Do you deserve being spoken to by new people then?
If you're actually reading what I'm saying, you can answer that question for yourself just fine. Your posts are absolutely ridiculous.
But I'll bite: if you've moved to a new country, you've had to talk to more than one person. And the odds that they all hate you specifically? Next to none. The majority of people with whom you'd interact
Depression often makes people think that nobody actually likes them - that the world is just putting up with their existence, and not even all the time at that. You know what? That requires professional help.
Also:
Not the same as saying those who don't aren't worth being with.
By the way, nobody actually said or espouses this. It was "non-busy people aren't worth the effort to date." You can be with people without dating them - we call them "friends," or "coworkers," or even "acquaintances."
This is why taking these comments out of context is so fundamentally flawed. We're talking specifically about romantic entanglement. Other kinds of social interaction are different. You're talking about a situation where everyone cuts you off in all contexts - which is the overreaction I'd expect from someone who is depressed.
Parents count as friends. New people would talk to you because you have parents. But alright. What if you move to a new country, and you talk to one dude. Like the hotel manager. And he hates your guts. Do you deserve being spoken to by new people then?
He's not saying that if non of the people you KNOW won't hang out with you, you're a bad person. He's saying that if you (honestly) try, and cannot get people to hang out, then you need to look in the mirror.
A conundrum of dating: scheduling dates with busy people is impossible. Dating non-busy people isn't worth the effort.
I stayed single for 5 years because I thought this applied to me, being unemployed. I've got lots of friends, and a decent social life, so according to the rest of the thread, this doesn't apply to me...
I still don't think I'm a good partner for a monogamous relationship, so when I discovered polyamory, it was almost a "Eureka" moment. My new girlfriend values my company, though scheduling time to see her is still a pain while she juggles work, and other partners.
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Just don't get too invested too fast.
(I'm really just complaining because I just had to push back a date to see King Lear at the Public by a week)
How are you supposed to fix yourself if people refuse to spend time with you because other people refuse to spend time with you?
If you're so out there that literally nobody will spend time with you, it's definitely time to seek professional help.
You said "people refuse to spend time with you," not "you don't know anybody." Your scenario is flawed because even if you have living parents, there's still a period of time where you don't yet have friends. At some point, you have to be introduced to people.
That's not what we're talking about. We're talking about (young) adults who have interacted with the world and know people. If some of the people you know refuse to spend time with you, then you might know some dickish people. If absolutely everybody that you know refuses to spend time with you, there's almost assuredly something wrong with you; there could be something wrong with them too, but there's definitely a problem with you.
I suppose there could be an edge case where you just get shat on by absolutely every single human being you encounter, but that's so rare as to effectively not exist.
If you really think everyone you encounter is just shitting on you, yes, you actually have a problem and yes, you really need professional help.
But I'll bite: if you've moved to a new country, you've had to talk to more than one person. And the odds that they all hate you specifically? Next to none. The majority of people with whom you'd interact
Depression often makes people think that nobody actually likes them - that the world is just putting up with their existence, and not even all the time at that. You know what? That requires professional help.
Also: By the way, nobody actually said or espouses this. It was "non-busy people aren't worth the effort to date." You can be with people without dating them - we call them "friends," or "coworkers," or even "acquaintances."
This is why taking these comments out of context is so fundamentally flawed. We're talking specifically about romantic entanglement. Other kinds of social interaction are different. You're talking about a situation where everyone cuts you off in all contexts - which is the overreaction I'd expect from someone who is depressed.
I still don't think I'm a good partner for a monogamous relationship, so when I discovered polyamory, it was almost a "Eureka" moment. My new girlfriend values my company, though scheduling time to see her is still a pain while she juggles work, and other partners.