That's kind of what I'm afraid of, actually. Especially since I won't be in a dorm room this fall so it will be easier for us to hang out, and her fiance is living 4 hours away for the foreseeable future to be with his sick. Hmm.
Well, its mostly that. But we've made jokes about being together when her fiance dies in various ways, and other things where we're together like that and he is inexplicably gone. Idk really just lots of little stuff, you know?
Kate makes those jokes with me when Adam is right there. :P
Oh hot damn, and here I was about to resurrect this thread!
Short story is I've started dating a friend of a friend and I'm pretty ambivalent to the whole thing. She's a fun person and sings like an angel, but we don't really have a ton to talk about. Went on our second date on Friday, and it went pretty well.
However, on Saturday was out with a few friends and ended up spending all of my time with this one friend of mine. Her and I have a pretty... storied history, but suffice to say we never actually hooked up... until we went back to her place and snogged* like freshman. She's not looking for anything serious, and this thing with the other girl is suggesting to me that I'm not either. Just gotta play this cool for the next few weeks...
*snogging only refers to the act of kissing passionately and vehemently. Nothing else... you perv
Dina and I went on a cruise earlier this month, and decided to renew our wedding vows (we will be married 20 years this year). While the event planner was getting things ready, I mentioned to her that being straight edge, I don't drink alcohol, and that might be a problem. She smiled, winked and mentioned that Dina said something and it was already taken care of. So when it comes time for it, there is a dummy champagne bottle with two flutes of ginger ale. This marked only the second time since I've been married that I have kissed a woman other than my wife or family members.
Katie and I are celebrating one year together today. Well, at least we would be if she wasn't sick with a stomach flu. Oh well. Still, this has absolutely been the best year of my life so far (cause it's also my birthday).
My friend just went through a terrifically nasty breakup. Now she's sending me messages that end with things like "I love you" and "You're my priority" for the first time in three years of really tight friendship. It's kind of doing my head in. Also, I'm getting increased attention from friends' girlfriends, and while that's a huge ego boost, I definitely don't want that attention.
Meanwhile, one week and no further messages from Facebook Girl. I kind of feel like following up to see if she just forgot, but I dunno.
How do you people get mixed up in such drama-filled situations?
My plan is simple. If a person is unstable and full of drama, I have nothing to do with that person. I don't talk to them. I don't spend time with them. They are a person that is not in my life.
If a person is chill, then hey, what's up? Let us all be together and have a good time.
That's pretty much all there is to it. If you do this, then nothing crazy will ever happen to you. Then again, life might be a lot less interesting for you. I say if crazy shit happens to you, don't worry about it. Enjoy it. That is a spice of life I have not tasted.
@Scott: Because fuck you, my friends are awesome, and I love them even if they're a bit crazy or bothersome sometimes?
Also, said drama isn't really drama. It could be if I was willing to be a proper cunt and get with my friend's girl, or have sex with my presently-emotionally-compromised friend. Luckily, I'm not a proper cunt and I would never do either of those things, so there's no drama.
@ninjarabbi: Be careful, dude. I may encourage people to take a lot of chances, but I would never encourage sleeping with a friend who's engaged.
Sometimes drama exists. In your own emotional microcosm, you may unintentionally be the cause or target of drama. If I ignored everyone who ever has drama, I'd be missing on the great things those people can offer me. Sometimes I have to get involved in drama, and it sucks.
When I was in High School, I ignored all the drama, and was kinda lonely. In college, I've had some drama of my own finally, and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world, because my college relationships have been far superior to my high school ones.
Maybe, Scrym (and other FRC members), you guys are just perfectly involved with the perfect people in the perfect ways to ignore all drama. Congrats to you, then. But I'm okay with where I'm at.
I've found everyone defines Drama in different ways and has different levels of Tolerance, hence Rubin doesn't like drama, so no romantic relationships for him in the last 10 years, that's one way to do it!
I on the other hand, study human drama as a hobby sooo it's endlessly fascinating and amusing to me. (but I also try and observe from as far away as possible just tossing out unhelpful advise.)
Maybe, Scrym (and other FRC members), you guys are just perfectly involved with the perfect people in the perfect ways to ignore all drama.
HAHAHAHA...nooope.
Yeah. Even though Rym and I almost never fight with each other and when we do it is really minor, I can testify to the fact that sometimes drama happens around us anyway. I mean, like a month ago one of our friends got really torqued at me for not telling her we were going to the park and was really cranky to me, and I ended up losing my temper and telling her off in front of the room full of FRC people. It was really embarrassing and frustrating! Also, I used to fight with Scott all the time when we lived together. He would make me cry all the time, and I would lose my temper! He couldn't really avoid me, since I was dating Rym, so I guess I was an exception to his no drama policy. I can be drama-y sometimes, but usually it involves me getting mad at someone and saying "Enough of this bullshit!"
Unless you're a robot, drama is inevitable. We have emotions, other peoples' emotions clash with them sometimes; whatever, it happens. The problem is when stupid people draw it out. That's unacceptable.
Drama is just a thing that happens. To remove yourself from all drama is to take yourself out of the possibility of having good situations too. For every bit of "drama" a friend puts me through, they usually have something that makes it worth it. I'd say that my roommate of the previous school year and his girlfriend are like that. They're great friends, but our interactions aren't completely drama-free. But I prefer to be their friends (and have a good group to play Pathfinder with, as well as a good friend in my major) than ignore them because we have occasionally fought over something. I mean, his girlfriend does some very silly things and has said stuff that upsets me. But at the same time, her Zora Bard in our Zelda-based Pathfinder game that I GM is probably the party's best character.
Drama is just a thing that happens. To remove yourself from all drama is to take yourself out of the possibility of having good situations too. For every bit of "drama" a friend puts me through, they usually have something that makes it worth it. I'd say that my roommate of the previous school year and his girlfriend are like that. They're great friends, but our interactions aren't completely drama-free. But I prefer to be their friends (and have a good group to play Pathfinder with, as well as a good friend in my major) than ignore them because we have occasionally fought over something. I mean, his girlfriend does some very silly things and has said stuff that upsets me. But at the same time, her Zora Bard in our Zelda-based Pathfinder game that I GM is probably the party's best character.
I have plenty of friends and family that hang out and have a good time without causing any drama. Everybody just stays cool.
I'm not saying you don't have friends, I'm just saying that sometimes people who cause drama are still worthy friends.
There are plenty of worthy friends who do not cause drama, so why do I need the ones who do?
Just like, there are plenty of good video games that aren't pay2win, so why even bother with a good video game that is pay2win?
I wouldn't exactly say that I can just decide not to be friends with certain people, at least not unless they do something so bad that I have to. Circumstances bring me to people, and I befriend them if that's the circumstance. They might cause drama, but I'm not just going to get rid of my friends because they are occasionally drama-inducing, or say something I don't like, or say something rude to me, or whatever. If they add an overall positive aspect to my life, they're worthy as friends, so long as they don't cause more drama than their friendship is worth. I just don't view any drama as an immediate reason to distance myself from someone. Often times, their emotions and situations they are put into result in screwed up things happening. But I cause drama too, so who am I to judge them?
Scott, if you cause no drama, then congrats. You deserve to have no drama around you. But I think most people will agree that whether or not they intend to, emotions can get the better of them and they can cause drama. I know it's true for me. So I don't hold it against people.
Anyway, I'm bored of discussing Scott who doesn't date.
How do I meets the all the single ladies? I'm really losing faith in this okcupid thing. It's just not working out for me. Something about me seems to repel any of the women I'm interested in. Where as my friend gets more messages than he can respond to.
Scott, making your friend cry regularly while she is living in your own house is definitely drama. Especially if she's your roommate's girlfriend and it eventually played a role in their departure. I'm guessing that you're just not in touch enough to realize this, and that's okay, but seriously: you cause drama.
Another point: If you think you're not involved in drama, you almost definitely are and are just oblivious. Obviously this happened to Scott, it's happened to me, it's likely happened to quite a few people that will read this.
Anyway, I'm bored of discussing Scott who doesn't date.
How do I meets the all the single ladies? I'm really losing faith in this okcupid thing. It's just not working out for me. Something about me seems to repel any of the women I'm interested in. Where as my friend gets more messages than he can respond to.
1) Take a xanax if you're like me and anxiety makes your heart thunder if you are even thinking about someone you dig. 2) Bars or coffeehouses, or maybe board game meetups or something. 3) Start talking.
Comments
Short story is I've started dating a friend of a friend and I'm pretty ambivalent to the whole thing. She's a fun person and sings like an angel, but we don't really have a ton to talk about. Went on our second date on Friday, and it went pretty well.
However, on Saturday was out with a few friends and ended up spending all of my time with this one friend of mine. Her and I have a pretty... storied history, but suffice to say we never actually hooked up... until we went back to her place and snogged* like freshman. She's not looking for anything serious, and this thing with the other girl is suggesting to me that I'm not either. Just gotta play this cool for the next few weeks...
*snogging only refers to the act of kissing passionately and vehemently. Nothing else... you perv
Meanwhile, one week and no further messages from Facebook Girl. I kind of feel like following up to see if she just forgot, but I dunno.
Things is weird all over, man.
My plan is simple. If a person is unstable and full of drama, I have nothing to do with that person. I don't talk to them. I don't spend time with them. They are a person that is not in my life.
If a person is chill, then hey, what's up? Let us all be together and have a good time.
That's pretty much all there is to it. If you do this, then nothing crazy will ever happen to you. Then again, life might be a lot less interesting for you. I say if crazy shit happens to you, don't worry about it. Enjoy it. That is a spice of life I have not tasted.
Also, said drama isn't really drama. It could be if I was willing to be a proper cunt and get with my friend's girl, or have sex with my presently-emotionally-compromised friend. Luckily, I'm not a proper cunt and I would never do either of those things, so there's no drama.
@ninjarabbi: Be careful, dude. I may encourage people to take a lot of chances, but I would never encourage sleeping with a friend who's engaged.
When I was in High School, I ignored all the drama, and was kinda lonely. In college, I've had some drama of my own finally, and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world, because my college relationships have been far superior to my high school ones.
Maybe, Scrym (and other FRC members), you guys are just perfectly involved with the perfect people in the perfect ways to ignore all drama. Congrats to you, then. But I'm okay with where I'm at.
I on the other hand, study human drama as a hobby sooo it's endlessly fascinating and amusing to me. (but I also try and observe from as far away as possible just tossing out unhelpful advise.)
I can be drama-y sometimes, but usually it involves me getting mad at someone and saying "Enough of this bullshit!"
Just like, there are plenty of good video games that aren't pay2win, so why even bother with a good video game that is pay2win?
I just don't view any drama as an immediate reason to distance myself from someone. Often times, their emotions and situations they are put into result in screwed up things happening. But I cause drama too, so who am I to judge them?
Scott, if you cause no drama, then congrats. You deserve to have no drama around you. But I think most people will agree that whether or not they intend to, emotions can get the better of them and they can cause drama. I know it's true for me. So I don't hold it against people.
How do I meets the all the single ladies? I'm really losing faith in this okcupid thing. It's just not working out for me. Something about me seems to repel any of the women I'm interested in. Where as my friend gets more messages than he can respond to.
Another point: If you think you're not involved in drama, you almost definitely are and are just oblivious. Obviously this happened to Scott, it's happened to me, it's likely happened to quite a few people that will read this.
2) Bars or coffeehouses, or maybe board game meetups or something.
3) Start talking.